Breaking Draco Malfoy
by imadoodlenoodle
Summary: Blaise likes pranks, he's friends with the twins. He doesn't like being messed with and when Draco sticks his homework to his desk he does just that. Blaise's psychological prank warfare will be released. Draco won't know what's hit him. Blaise in 5th yea
1. Twins and Glue

Chapter One- Twins And Glue

Blaise Zabini was bored. Unknown to all, Blaise was friends with the Weasley twins; they shared many interests –well, they shared one- but that was enough for friendship to blossom. Their friendship had progressed so far that the normally restrained Slytherin was confident enough to disclose things about himself that he would normally have kept to himself like any good Slytherin. Their relationship was so good that the Weasley twins knew that when Blaise was bored, people got broken.

Unlike the twins' pranks, that were designed to humiliate, embarrass and generally bring people down a peg or two, Blaise was more Slytherin. His pranks broke people. Blaise messed with their head. If Blaise was bored then you weren't being paranoid, you were being cautious. His latest prank had led third year Hufflepuff, Jimmy Carlson, into being removed from lessons for two weeks while he was treated for an unrelenting desire to eat marshmallows and a fear that Hagrid wanted to "grind his bones to make his bread." It had only taken Blaise four days to completely break little Jimmy.

"Forge, I do believe we shall be having trouble."

"I concur, dear brother of mine. Curiosity and a professional interest do compel me though to inquire as to whom you will be..."

"...releasing your boredom upon."

Blaise smirked. He was currently lounging about on a black couch that the Room of Requirement had provided. The twins were both seated in matching armchairs, both bright red and gold. The room they were in was their Command Centre. Their HQ. It was a large room, completely white with a plain black wooden floor. Nearest the door was their 'thoughts and ideas' area, where they would hang around whilst coming up with prank ideas. Opposite them was a simple table with four chairs, where they would eat if they didn't want to stop working. The other half of the room had a large conference table, half the length of a Hogwarts dining table. This was where they worked and plotted, writing ideas down and deciding how to actually carry out their ideas. On the back wall was a large blackboard, which was used in the final phase. This was where they would write up a simplified version of the plan so they could check which stage they were in and what had to be carried out and set up next.

"Draco. He thought it would be funny to stick my Charms homework to my desk. I did not." Blaise smiled at the memory of Draco realising who he had just pranked; Draco had spent the past days vigilantly watching Blaise, looking for any sign of trouble that was coming his way.

"So, darling friend of ours, have you a thought to how you will break Mr Malfoy?" George said, smiling as he thought up some ideas of his own. George looked over at Fred and saw a smile creeping onto his face as well. Fred turned to look at him;

"Are you thinking about penguins as well?"

"As long as you are also thinking about mushrooms..."

"We have the same idea then!" Blaise let the bafflement show on his face. After nearly a year of friendship, he still did not know how they both came up with the same idea for pranks, especially when they included the most random things.

"Right then. I don't want to handle any animals this time. Not after the mess the Boar made." All three paused for a minute, letting the Boar incident fill their minds. The 'incident' was so...uncontrollable, they had christened the Boar with a capital 'B', thus making his name Boris the Boar. Fred shuddered; he had drawn the short straw when they had to recapture Boris and he had become the bait. Blaise, sensing that the reminiscing could go on for a while, quickly brought the twins back.

"I was thinking about glue." Glue, they had found, was a remarkable muggle invention. Because it was not magical, it could not be gotten rid of by a simple unsticking spell. No, glue had to be manually taken care of, taking up the victim's time and usually prolonging the embarrassment. Glue, Blaise had decided, was the reason he would not join the Dark Lord. He could not join with a man who wanted to destroy such creative minds. Perhaps if someone had introduced the Dark Lord to glue when he was younger, they would not be in this situation. Glue was wonderful.

"No, people are getting used to it, being more careful and everything. We should stop using glue for a while..."

"...lull them into a false sense of security..."

"...then attack with a major glue related incident."

Blaise had also gotten used to the twins way of speaking and had found a way of combating the pain that comes from moving your head quickly from one side to the other. Blaise merely looked away, usually at the spot between the twins' heads.

"So, glue is out then."

"How about..." What followed was a two hour discussion on the weapon of choice. It also included a conversation about the pros and cons of charming Dumbledore's beard into changing colour every five minutes when he was in public. George liked the simplicity of the idea, but Fred wanted to come up with a way of making the beard change colour faster depending on the number of people present. Blaise stayed out of their argument, but did express his support for Fred's idea.

In the end they had come up with their weapons. Polyjuice, squirty cream, and a magical recording device would be their weapons. Draco Malfoy would be broken.

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Now back complete with edits from my beta Manic-Cheese-Fairy (great name), and my new beta TheGirlCanRock, someone who everyone should be pleased about having because she has made this chapter read-able.

Bye, Sarah.


	2. Pretty Boys and Potions

**Chapter Two- Pretty Boys And Potions**

The weekend was now over and it was time to go back to class. Being a Monday, it meant that Blaise's first class was double Potions with the Gryffindors. This was one of his favourite lessons, not only was he actually good at Potions but Snape would be teaching, which meant there would be plenty of snarky and harsh comments directed at the Gryffindors. Snape had a very...dry sense of humour and it appealed greatly to Blaise. But first, clothes must be put on; breakfast eaten and Draco must be freaked out. Blaise started with the last, seeing as it would be the easiest. In fact, three sentences would do it. Jumping out of bed, Blaise crossed the dorm and pulled back Draco's bed curtains. Leaning in close, Blaise put his face nose-to-nose with Draco's. Sensing his private space being violated, Draco's eyes flickered opened, and widened when he saw Blaise's inane grin.

"Good morning Draco. How are you this fine day? Ready to face...the world?" Blaise's grin only widened as Draco's mask dropped slightly, widened as the fear crossed Draco's eyes.

"Morning Blaise. Will you back off, or are you looking for a morning kiss?" The last was said with a smirk; Draco might be scared and fearful but he wouldn't let Blaise see it.

Blaise backed off; "You offering? Nah, I like my guys dark and mysterious. You're too...too pretty." Blaise moved over to his area and grabbed the clothes he had left out the night before. Draco's fear was quickly being replaced by annoyance.

"Pretty?! Pansy is pretty, I am handsome- no, heart-breakingly good looking- great looking! How dare you!"

"Sorry Draco, but all Malfoys are pretty; your dad, granddad. I've seen the portraits. You are all similar, all pretty. You are, what I believe the Muggles call, a 'pretty boy'." With that Blaise turned and left the room, entering the bathroom. Unlike Crabbe and Goyle he washed.

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Blaise left the Slytherin common room as Draco was dressing. He quickly made his way to the Great Hall for breakfast. Blaise slid onto the bench and picked up a couple of pieces of toast. Generously lathering them with butter he ate slowly, while keeping his eye on the door. When Theo came in, he quickly made sure the boy sat opposite- instead of next to- him. This would leave Draco no other choice but to sit next to him. Perfect. Theo immediately understood what was going on and followed Blaise's instructions, also helping himself to some toast. Toast was a very Slytherin thing. Gryffindors mainly ate large fatty breakfasts; Ravenclaws daintily ate a lot of porridge with fruit- good brain food, or bagels; the Hufflepuffs were inclined to sandwiches, made from the various meats, eggs and spread available. Slytherins went for a clean but plain breakfast. Not very amusing but it was breakfast. I mean, who cares what people ate for breakfast? No-one would be conducting a survey, no-one would laugh at someone for eating toast for breakfast, and they wouldn't compare what the majority of houses ate and how that compared with the others. No-one would write a five line conclusion stating their findings.

It was when Blaise was on his second piece of toast that Draco finally made his entrance, no doubt late after spending fifteen minutes on his hair. Blaise realised that his fame at breaking people with psychological prank warfare had spread, proved when Draco's face paled at the thought of having to sit next to him while Blaise was annoyed. Blaise just smiled predatorily at him and motioned for him to sit. Draco slowly crossed the threshold of the door and made his way over. He glanced nervously around, looking for a hint of what was about to happen, but saw nothing. Not that that was any reassurance. If anything it made it worse.

Draco came to a stop and looked at the bench, searching for a sign, anything. Finding nothing he slowly sat down. And jumped when Theo turned to him and cheerfully cried; "Morning Draco, took your time!" He jumped because he now knew something was up; Slytherins never cheerfully greeted anyone, and greetings were polite and _dignified_.

"Probably sorting out his hair, do hurry up Draco, we have to leave in a minute." Blaise turned his attention back to his toast, while Draco reached for a blueberry muffin- his favourite- but then decided to leave them and instead have a piece of toast. Draco then noticed Blaise's eager eyes on his hand, so he instead decided to pour himself some orange juice but seeing the eyes flash with mirth he decided that maybe a glass of water would be better. Seeing Blaise's eyes lose their smugness he safely poured and drank the water. He was taking a sip when Blaise stood up suddenly and slapped him on the back saying;

"Come on, Potions is starting." Blaise pulled Draco to his feet then strode away, Theo and the other Slytherins following him. Draco took one last look at the most likely pranked food and dejectedly followed also. Leaving the Hall he saw Blaise waiting for him, with a smirk that got bigger as Draco went over to him. It was then that Draco realised that Blaise was a master manipulator and a Slytherin. He would never be that obvious if he was pranking someone, never would any emotion give away the prank.

"None of it was pranked, was it?" Draco asked, already knowing the answer.

"Nope." The smirk got even bigger.

"I was so hungry. All I had was a sip of water! Water!" Draco and Blaise resumed the walk down to the dungeons.

"You made me prank myself! So hungry! Water!" Blaise just carried on walking, saying nothing, though he did chuck Draco a muffin. Draco stared at the muffin. Surely it wasn't pranked? Blaise was his friend after all; Blaise wouldn't let him go hungry! Draco devoured the muffin and it was only as they entered the classroom that he knew he had made the wrong choice. His hair grew down past his shoulders and became bushy and brown. Blaise had given him Hermione Granger's hair.

As Draco fled the Potions classroom, Snape merely raised an eyebrow and waved his wand at the board, bringing up today's potion and instructions.

"The Draught of Ego. A complex potion that I expect you to be able to brew to at least a standard degree of correctness. The Draught was first created by Potion Master Michaelo Vinchiancee. He slipped it into a rival's drink and for the rest of the night the rival believed himself to be above everyone. Even the Doge. Unfortunately the Doge was at this particular dinner and did not take kindly to the man's self proclaimed importance and swiftly had the man...terminated. Because some of you," Snape glared at Neville, "have trouble creating the simplest and least complex wart remover potion, a potion which first years begin their studies with, I have decided to group you into fours. If you organise yourselves using intelligence then _hopefully _you shall be finished at the end of the lesson with a somewhat passable potion. One member from each group shall then test the potion." Looking over at Harry, Snape lowered his voice and suggested, "Choose someone in your group however, on whom you shall be able to tell if there is any change, as some _people_ in this class will find themselves immune to this potion." Neville put his hand up and asked; "Because they have a strong will against personality altering potions?" Snape looked at him and smiled- or grimaced- tightly. "No, Mr Longbottom. Ten points from Gryffindor for not waiting to be called upon and five more from Gryffindor for stupidity. To answer your question, for some people," He looked back to Harry, "for some, they already think they are above everyone _and the rules_, so the potion does nothing to increase their already large ego. Begin!"

Blaise smiled. Harry Potter had one of the smallest egos in the whole school, but Snape was right about the rule breaking and Potter did get away with most things. He crashed a flying car into the Whomping Willow for Darks sake! Didn't get expelled- anyone else would have been straight out. Potter has friends in high places, specifically in the Headmasters office. Blaise paired up with Pansy, Theo and Toby. Draco did not return to class. Neville Longbottom tested his group's potion, Snape took thirty more points from him for "thinking he was above and better in Potions than Snape himself,"- five of those points were taken for stupidity, five more for Neville being entirely deluded.

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**Speedily but goodyly (?) Beta-d by TheGirlCanRock. She is great isn't she? Almost as awesome as me, **_**almost... **_**Poll! Give me your opinion! You're opinionated aren't you?**

**Adieu, Sarah **


	3. More Potions And Ginger Flirts

**Chapter Three- More Potions And Ginger Flirts**

After dinner, Blaise headed straight up to the Room of Requirement to meet the twins and to go over the plan in more detail. When he got there, he found the twins bent over one end of the table, talking and writing.

"What are you doing?" As Blaise got closer he saw a list of potions and a list of products that the twins sold via their mail order catalogue. On each list some of the items were highlighted.

"We were conducting our..." One twin started.

"...monthly stocktake of potions and products." The other finished.

"Why are some highlighted?" Blaise asked, but then looking at the highlighted potions he guessed what was going on.

"We haven't brewed anything for a while; I take it that we are running low on supplies? I guess you want me to help you with some of your stuff as well?" The twins nodded.

"Business has been booming, and lots of people ordered stuff before Christmas and then ordered more after Christmas with all the money they got. We have enough to cover all the placed orders, but we don't have any of the favoured products to sell at the moment. We messed up big time." George spun the lists around and explained; "The things highlighted in green we are running low on, the ones in yellow we have none of, and if it has a star next to it then that is your job. I will do the ones with a dash and Fred will create the ones with a circle. Starting with the ones in yellow. We've written up a schedule for you, starting with the Polyjuice, which will take two months to brew, and finishing with the Growth Cream. As you can see you will be handling a couple of potions at a time, but we've done it before."

The twins had broken down the next two months into days and on each day there were instructions on what Blaise should be doing and when. For instance, next Friday Blaise would be starting the Blandness Potion, adding roasted newt liver to another potion, stirring the Polyjuice five times clockwise at seven thirty in the morning, reducing the heat from a blue flame to a... The list went on. Next Friday would be busy, but George was right- they had done it before they could do it again.

"And this is your schedule for product creation" Fred handed him another schedule. One which Blaise wasn't expecting.

"There's two! I won't have any free time!" Looking at the weekends Blaise could see that Sunday from ten to one he would be creating various sweets with an hour break before creating quills that changed words as you wrote into...inappropriate words.

"Two months of hard work or four months of not so hard work?"

"I do have OWLs this year guys, you know those big tests that you somehow managed to scrape some okay grades on?"

"Oooh, someone's pissy today!" George stage whispered to Fred.

"I know, don't you think he's cute though when he's angry?" Fred replied in a mock whisper.

"And the way his eyes light up! I mean-"

"Okay, okay! I get it! When do we start?" Blaise said the last part with much reluctance.

"Tomorrow." The twins chorused.

"Joy. Anyway, The Plan."

"The Plan? Complete with capital letters and everything?" Seeing Blaise was about to get angry with him, Fred moved right on. "Alright, the first day you get out of bed at say... three AM? Go over to Draco's bed and using the squirty cream, you spray some on to his hand. Then, you call Jim*, get him to take the can and you proceed with the next stage. Brother, would you like to continue?"

"Indeed I would. The second stage. You use this feather," George handed him a feather, "and you tickle his nose!" George and Fred finished together.

"And disappear back to bed?"

"Yep, then Draco dearest will wake up and be 'what the Merlin?' and you put your idea across to him, then proceed with The Next Phase! Complete with capital letters!"

"I might wait until the second night to put across The Idea. Draco is a Slytherin- he may be slightly suspicious if I have an idea straight away."

"We concur, The Idea now is it? Complete-"

"with capital letters, yes. Now let me have a look at this list you've put together. I do, after all, need to know what ingredients to...procure."

The next two months would leave Blaise busy with brewing, homework and everything else he had to do. They would also lure Draco into a false sense of security. Perfect.

Fred conjured up a clock that read;

61 Days, 5 Hours, 22 Minutes and 14 Seconds

When it had finished counting down it would be the first day of the hopefully successful Draco-Breaking Week.

Not that Blaise would fail.

* * *

*Jim- not all House Elves have silly names like Blinky and Flunky. Some have perfectly good names like Stella who worked in laundry, and Dave who cleaned the classrooms on the fifth floor. Jim didn't really have a job; he just did 'stuff'. Therefore Jim was a good friend of the Weasleys and Blaise. Jim's father Barry coincidently helped the Marauders with some of their pranks. How else did that giraffe get into Snape's bed at five o'clock in the morning?

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**You've already read it so you might as well review and give me my fix :). Again, take a moment now to thank TheGirlCanRock. *pauses* Now that's over, there's a poll. You know this, I know this, the story knows it won't be finished until...I've finished it so. Hmm... As I have said before there are many ways I have planned for this to end but 'there can only be one' so which do you think would be better?**

**Auf Wiedersehen, Sarah. (I no longer have to take German so I will never have to use that phrase again. I use it now in honour of five years of German. It won't be dearly missed).**


	4. Cherry Creamed Nipples

61 Days, 5 Hours, 22 Minutes and 14 Seconds later...

It was time. The Polyjuice had been brewed and now only required a piece of hair from Draco, which would be easy to get seeing as Draco and he shared a dorm. Of course, the first part of the plan did not require the Polyjuice- it would only be needed tomorrow and the days after that.

Blaise climbed out of bed and slinked over to Draco's bed. This was the hardest part. All the beds in Slytherin had protection charms on to protect the sleeper from any 'incidents' that may occur. Luckily, Blaise had been able to buy the counter charms off of a graduate for a small fee. Wand in one hand and the squirty cream in the other- the feather in his pocket- Blaise pointed his wand at the bed and whispered;

"cancer magnus nocens alica"

There was a faint blue glow, indicating that the charms were down. They would stay down for twenty minutes; to get them to stay down for longer would require more energy and a complex spell.

Blaise pulled back the curtain and smiled at the sight before him. Draco was laying spread eagle across the bed; clutched in one hand was a small grey toy dragon, no doubt a present from mummy. By a twist of fortune the free hand was nearest Blaise and open. Blaise was quick to cover the hand with a generous helping of the cream before pulling the feather out. Slowly and quietly, Blaise reached out with the feather and used it to tickle Draco's nose. His nose twitched. Blaise tickled again. The nose twitched again. Sighing with annoyance Blaise raised the feather once more and with an air of determination around him tickled Draco's nose like there was no tomorrow. Success.

Draco raised his hand and rubbed his nose. Unfortunately Blaise was not quick enough to move, but that didn't matter because Draco slept on. Phew...

Blaise tipped his head to the side and studied Draco intensely for a moment before a wide grin spread across his face. Although the plan was for Blaise to only use the cream once, Draco had not woken up or shown any signs of awaking. This inspired Blaise to carry on. Blaise quickly filled Draco's hand with more cream and then tickled his ear. It worked. Up went Draco's hand and his ear was now covered. It was childish, Blaise knew that, but tonight was all about getting Draco confused about the squirty cream so that the _weirder_ parts would freak Draco out.

Thinking on the rest of the week and what it would hold for Draco, Blaise decided to go all out. It just so happened that Draco slept without any shirt on. A quick sticking and preserving spell and Draco was the proud owner of two cream covered nipples, each sporting a cherry kindly donated by Jim.

This was the part that could seriously go wrong for Blaise. If Draco woke up in the middle of this next part... Not only would Blaise be hexed from here to the Great Hall but everyone would think he was gay and took advantage of people while they slept. But, if Blaise had learnt anything from the Twins it was that risks must be taken for plans to succeed. Also, pranks tended to be funnier the more risk involved, so Blaise summoned his courage and went for the kill.

In one hand Blaise carried the can of squirty cream. With the other hand? He reached over and, after averting his eyes, lifted up Draco's boxers. Blaise jabbed the can down there and squirted. Squirted his cream, like he had never squirted before! Soon the can was empty, Draco's boxers were full and the charms were about to be reactivated.

"Jim!" Blaise somehow loudly whispered.

"Yes Master 'bini Sir?" Jim quickly appeared and bowed quickly.

"Take this can, get rid of it. And remember, this **never** happened."

"Of course! Jim is good house elf! Jim would never tell on funny masters. That is no what good house el-" It was at this point Jim caught sight of Draco and let out a high pitch squeaky laugh.

"Ohhhhh Master is going to be in much much trouble if the Ferret Boy finds out!"

"Ferret Boy?" Blaise inquired.

Jim grabbed an ear and started mildly pulling on it. "Well you sees Sir we house elves be seeing everything. And when that clumpy man turned-" Blaise cut him off.

"- Okay. I haven't got time for the story now, but I see your point. Calling him Ferret Boy is fine by me. Anyway you better get out of here Jim. I need to go back to bed. You'll have some more cans for us tomorrow?"

"Yes Sir. Thank you. I will be seeings you tomorrow then Sir!" With that Jim disappeared and Blaise went back to bed, carefully pulling the bed curtains tightly shut. He slept with a smile all night.

The grin on Blaise's face only widened when he awoke. Why? Oh, maybe because he had awoken to Draco screaming. Loudly.

"What the FUCK! I've been VIOLATED! ME! Draco, scion to the twenty plus years of pureblood breeding, wealthy, opulent, civil, courteous, cultivated, gentlemanly, good-mannered, gracious, hospitable, mannerly, polished, refined, punctilious and glorious House of Malfoy! Who dares?!"

Blaise schooled his face into a mask of indifference before pulling the curtains open and getting out of bed.

"Draco, you do realise that most of those words mean the same thing? You do? Good good." Blaise didn't look at Draco at all while he spoke; instead he carried on with his normal routine- grabbing clothes for the day before turning around and heading into the bathroom, never once looking at Draco. It was only as he was about to enter the next room did Blaise stop and turn around.

"What do you mean _violated_?"

"Look at me!" Blaise did. Then laughed, it was even better when Draco was standing up.

There was the creamed chest, still with cherries. Draco's boxers were filled to the brim of the cream and looked like they were about to explode, there was even a trail of cream leading down to them. There was still cream on Draco's ear and in the area around his eye.

"I- eh I mean...I don't know what to say. I mean, at first it looks like you just got a bit bored at night and decided to _play with your wand_. That was my first reaction, but now I get a proper look at you...hmm...nope. I have no thoughts on the matter!" Blaise turned and went for his shower, leaving Draco confused...and slightly aroused.

The really good thing about sticking and preservation charms is that they are a bugger to get off. A shower won't do it- nope, you had to go to Madame Pomfrey and get her to apply all sorts of potions and lotions. That, therefore, would have been the reason why Draco came to breakfast sporting- though small- breasts. With erect nipples it seemed. Draco, after fourth year, had begun to get his robes tailored fully and so the cut of his robes was sharp, the material was the softest ever attained. They were also rather tight around the chest, so Draco's small breasts were larger than what they would have been if he had been wearing a normal robe.

He reached the table in record speed and flung himself down next to Blaise.

"You have got to help me! I can't go to Potions with tits!"

"I am afraid that I cannot, my robes would be even tighter. Anyway, the cut would be all wrong. Just go to Pomfrey, she will sort you out."

"I would be Blaise but I have cream and bloody CHERRIES STUCK TO MY CHEST!" Unfortunately for Draco the hall had quietened a bit at his entrance, and further more after that of Snape's, leaving everyone to be able to hear Draco's last comment. It didn't help that Draco had practically screamed it out either.

"Two points from Slytherin for that ungodly outburst!" All the students looked amazed at the Professor who NEVER took points from his own House. The amazement lessened though, when they caught his next comment.

"Twenty points to Slytherin for Draco being open to experimentation and his dedication to find his 'true' self. Be it boy, girl or potions ingredients if he continues with his current behaviour."

"And Draco? Come to my office tonight at six and I will see if I can get that cream off of you." With that Snape decided against breakfast in the Great Hall and left for his personal chambers not fully comprehending what he had just said and the consequences.

"I must say brother, I always knew that they were close"

"Yes. It must be Snape's dashing wit-"

"-his long raven black silky hair-"

"-the way his eyes gleam when Neville blows something up-"

"-and let's not forget the nose..."

"the Nose! Complete with capital letters and everything! So strong-"

"-so masculine-"

"-such a strong and powerful feature, that demands respect!"

"Catch me brother, for I am swooning!"

"As am I!"

The rest of the hall laughed along at the Twins antics. Blaise, along with the rest of the Slytherins, did not laugh, though they did permit themselves a small smirk at Draco's expense.

Blaise picked up a piece of toast, buttered it and wore an evil grin as he thought about the next stage of The Plan, complete with capi-

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**Beta'ed by ThatGirlCanRock, written by me. There is a poll about the ending on my profile, so, if you could go and vote that would be great. Reviews are welcome, flames will be used to roast small animals...and marshmallows.**


	5. The Magical Properties of Beards

As the day went on Blaises imagination started running a bit wild. Instead of sticking to the plan, Blaise had came up with a _variation_, one which he hoped would further cause Draco confusion. After going to the Twins with his new idea- and receiving their approval- Blaise only had one more stop before he could retire to the Slytherin dungeons. Well, two ish. Maybe three... Blaise paused for a moment and tried to think of how many more people he could involve, but Blaise never spent longer than two weeks on his pranks so planned- no. Two more stops then back to the dungeon!

The first was the hardest. Dumbledore. After a quick 'point me' spell Blaise found the Headmaster on the fourth floor, looking out of a window that over looked the lake watching the sun set.

"Good evening Mr Zabini. It is rather pleasant up here, is it not? It is so hard for people to find time in their days to just stop and pause for a moment, to savour the moment. It is a shame. Is there anything I can do for you Mr Zabini?"

"You may call me Blaise Sir. Yes there is actually. You see, I am conducting a magical survey on beards."

"Beards you say? Magical properties and whatnot?" Dumbledore stroked his beard and resumed looking out of the window. "I myself once happened upon a book that mentioned the possible magical properties of beards. Unfortunately I had recently, at that moment in time, became Headmaster and was unable to continue my reach. I would be extremely interested in your findings Mr Za- Blaise. Perhaps afterwards you could show me your conclusions? Yes... What an excellent idea you have had!"

'You have got to be kidding me! Who made me the Fates bitch? Now I have to come up with a report and make it semi plausible. Great. Fantastic. Bloody Yippee!' Blaise wasn't that happy right now, but being a good Slytherin he kept a blank face.

"Thank you Sir. I am sure I will e able to send you a copy. I was wondering Sir if you would be able to help me with it? I require a number of strand from your beard."

"Of course! I would be happy to help! Here you go!" Dumbledore cut off a couple of pieces of hair from his beard and handed them to Blaise.

"Do be careful of course Blaise, I would hate to see any of my hair used in any nefarious pranks. Lemon drop? No? Ahh I must be parting ways now, the work of a headmaster is never done! Toodles!" With that Dumbledore swept of leaving Blaise alone with a grudging respect for the man. And his over looking of the rules...

* * *

Five minutes later saw Blaise nearing the dungeons, trying to find his last target.

'Ahh...there he is. Alone? Hmm...she must be somewhere near though. Better do this quick. I definitely won't tell George what he will be drinking.'

"voco insolitus of saeta commodo"

Blaise repeated the spell three times, smirking at the sight of his victim jumping every time a hair was pulled out. His smirk dimmed slightly though when he actually felt the hair. Oh so greasy. He put the hair into a plastic bag- wouldn't want to have to burn his robes after- then put the bag into his robe pocket. Then Blaise disappeared. Disappeared like...a really fastly disappearing thingy... Wher I hear you ask? To the dungeon of course! Everyone knows that Slytherin only hang out in the dungeons, the Forbidden Forest and other pernicious and sinister places. What would Blaise be doing? Plotting evil deeds of course! Or doing his Arithmancy homework. Either one.

* * *

"Blaise there you are. Snape managed to get the cream and cherries off. The bastard used a obscure sticking spell, Snape thinks it might be a personal family one. Anyway he told me I better find out who did this so I need your help. Well? What do you think, what can I do?"

'Perfect. Draco is playing straight into my hands. Evil laugh *mwahhahahah hah lol ha ha mwahaaha...'

Pretending to think it over Blaise took some time to form his answer.

"Well, it seems to me like whoever did this might do it again, so I would put up a visual recording spell. If they do come again tonight then we can take the film to Snape and he can get the bastard expelled."

"Great idea! Hey, do you know any good protection spells to keep them out?"

"You can't Draco!"

"Wht do you mean? Why can't I?"

'Think fast. Faster...'

"We won't have enough evidence. It would just show someone trying to get in."

"You're right. Can we put up the spell now?"

"Sure. I can change it as well so it will only record after midnight and when people enter the dorm."

"That would be great! Come on!" Draco ran off into the dorm, leaving Blaise to follow at a slower- normal- pace while the other Slytherins wondered why on Earth Draco was running about for.

* * *

Where- Scotland, Hogwarts, Dungeons, Slytherin Common Room  
Time- 03:42 PM  
Who- Blaise Zabini, Fredrick Weasley, George Weasley

Wait- what? Weasleys in Slytherin?

For some reason all the Slytherin students had felt an over whelming urge to go to bed before ten o'clock this night. The fact that their food had been laced by Jim wit- They felt an over whelming urge, okay?

Blaise pulled out the three strands of hair he had been given by Dumbledore and added them to the flask of polyjuice potion Fred and George had brought with them.

"I must say that the decor in here is positively... help me dear brother for I am having trouble speaking!"

"A mircle! We must celebreate for such an event should not pass in silence!"

"Shut it you two. Yes it might look a bright depression and dark but when you've spent your life being blinded by the reds and golds of your common room anything would look dark in comparison. Take this Fred." Blaise handed the potion to Fred who promptly chugged it down.

"Maybe maybe, but nothing compares to the blinding brightness that is Hufflepuff!" All three boys shivered at the memory of the Hufflepuff common room. It was bright yellow. Everywhere.

The floors were black wood. Good contrast.

George and Blaise watched with interest as Fred slowly turned into Albus Dumbledore. His hair grew long, as did a beard and went from red to white. His nose grew as did his body, gaining a couple of inches. Both the nose and the body. His skin darkened slightly, took on a old parchment colour tinge. And wrinkled. Lots of them.

"Blaise?"

"Yes George?"

"The time is four in the morning. Why did we have to drug your housemates?"

Blaise shrugged. "Just fancied a bit of quiet really."

"Oh. Okay." They turned their attention back to Fred- well back to the Headmaster really. There standing in Hogwarts school robes stood the Headmaster.

"We better change your robes. Don't think they are the sort of thing Dumbledore would wear. Too...plain? Not blinding enough?"

"Completely agree...neon green with pink triming?"

"I like your sense of style." The two boys set about transfiguring Fred's robes into something more Dumbledore-ish.

"Ready? Okay? The camera is all set up. It will activate as soon as I press this button." Blaise held up a control with a big blue button. "I will be in bed with the curtains closed so cough loudly before you shut the door so I will know when to deactivate it. Give me two minutes then knock first and enter okay?" Seeing their nods Blaise left them to entertain themselves while he got ready for bed.

* * *

Albus Dumbledore entered the Slytherin fifth year dorms at quarter past four in the morning. He headed to Dracos bed and pulled his wand out. A muttered spell was cast and the wards surrounding Draco's bed fell.  
From a man-bag that Dumbledore was carrying, he pulled out a can of squirty cream and two cherries. Soon Draco was able to get reacquainted with his cherry cream nipples. An obscure sticking spell and preserving spell was cast. The can was put down and Dumbledore reached into the bag to pu out a packet of lemon drops. he lent over Draco and started laying out lemon drops on his chest.  
Another sticking spell was cast. The can of cream was picked up again and Dumbledore got to work spraying a beard across Dracos lower half of his face. Cream was also applied to the area surrounding his head, so Draco looked like he had long white hair. Well longer white hair. Another preserving spell and a mild protection spell was added to the 'hair'.  
Dracos boxers were transformed from plain black to neon green with canary yellow trimming.

The can of squirty cream was put bag into the bag as where the lemon drops. A note was dropped onto the bed and with that Albus Dumbledore left the room, a pleased smile on his face and a twinkle in his eye.

Blaise pushed the blue button a deactivated the spell. Oh he could not wait until tomorrow.

* * *

A/N

voco insolitus of saeta commodo - summon strand of hair. Not exactly original but oh well...

Coming up and things that will be revealed; what do the lemon drops spell? What will Draco end up yelling to the whole school? What have the Twins got to say? And another inappropriate relationship between a teacher and a student?

I keep typing Blasie. Sorry if I ever miss the misspelling.


	6. Inappropriate Relationships

Unlike the day before, Blaise woke up earlier than usual, thus was able to leave the dorm earlier than usual. Before he could leave however he had to take the spell down and collect the recording of last night. Draco and he would watch the tape in a disused classroom they had found on the second floor. Actually, there were a lot of disused classrooms, but this one they had had the elves clean up and they had gotten them to add a couple of sofas and tables. Kind of like a private common room.

Again Blaise sat down at the Slytherin table in the Great Hall, and again picked up a piece of toast and buttered it and again he slowly ate the toast with his eyes trained on the door. Slowly the Great Hall started filling up and soon there was only fifteen minutes left for breakfast. It was also around the time that Draco normally entered.

The doors flew open and Blaises hopes were raised before being dashed. It was not Draco, but Snape. By now most people were wondering who Blaise was waiting for. The way his eyes had not strayed from the door made it pretty obvious; most in the Hall had also started watching the door.

Blaise was just finishing his second piece of toast when Draco came in. Again Draco sped over to the table and flung himself down, slouching and hunched over.

"Good morning Draco, how are this fine morning?"

"We need to watch that tape NOW."

"Classes start in ten minutes. We do not have the time and I am not being late for Transfiguration." Draco groaned and started eating, so Blaise took this opportunity to wave a small wave at the Headmaster. Which he returned. As Draco was watching.

"Why is Dumbledore waving at me?! What does he want? Oh Dark Blaise it must be him! What am I going to do? The bloody Headmaster wants me!"

"Draco calm down, I'm sure the Headmaster does not fancy you. Can you really imagine him sneaking into the dorms late at night and _violating_ you? Filch maybe but Dumbledore? Calm yourself." Telling someone to calm down does not inspire them to calm down, quite the opposite in fact.

"I would calm myself, but it is a bit difficult Blaise when I have cream and bloody cherry tits again and 'I LOVE YOU' STUCK TO MY FREAKING CREST!" Did I mention how tight Dracos robes were? Not only could people see his cream'n'cherry breasts, they could also see a distinct outline of an 'I', a heart and the word 'you'. So REALLY tight.

Like many things that happened today, they followed a similar pattern to what happened yesterday. So again, Draco got angry, and again he ended up yelling the last part of the sentence loud enough for everyone to hear.

"You also have detention with me tonight. I will see you at seven Mr Malfoy." Snape was about to leave the room when he paused; "ten points to Slytherin for being at ease with your feelings." Snape shuddered on the word feelings and swept out of the room, robes billowing behind him.

Many students were in a stunned silence. Snape had said the word 'feelings'? He didn't take any points away? Maybe George and Fred were right maybe…you know? Maybe…

And speaking of the Twins…

"Oh brother!"

"I know! Perhaps he will lick away the cream and lemon drops,"

"Slowly while gazing into Draco's eyes!"

"While his hand slowly strokes his mem-"

This was perhaps a _bit too far_.

"FRED AND GEORGE WEASLEY! DETENTION! WITH ME! THREE HOURS- MY OFFICE AT SIX! TEN POINTS FROM GRYFFINDOR! YOU'VE GONE TOO FAR THIS TIME!"

George turned to his brother and in a stage whispered said; "Snape and Draco, now Miss McG coming on to us. Why are the children not safe from prowling professors? Is anyone safe?"

"I know Brother, I just hope we aren't flavour of the month and are cast away when she's finished playing with us."

"Like a cat playing with a mouse!"

"Exactly brother, exactly." Fred looked at his feet and shook his head slowly, like he was ashamed of the teachers, the school, and the world!

"OUT! NOW! OUT!! Both of you! I have never…" With that McGonagall pulled the Twins out by the ear muttering things about disrespecting students and how things had been different back in her day.

* * *

A/N

Just a short chapter, wrote it today in my free so... anyway next update Sunday ish hopefully... I just need to work out how to get a certain character involve. A hint, 'tis a she. I had never thought about it before but this character has got the best * in the world. So many possibilities. Anyway, coming up! Whips and chains, dirty old men (not just Dumbledore) and if you want to get technical there will be some incriminating photos... Toodles!


	7. Photos and Tapes

The world did not revolve around Draco, so the school day carried on. Homework was given, notes were taken and the day past like any normal day. Draco ran off at the end of the last class, though people did not realise it, Draco was actually quite clever- only unlike a certain Gryffindor, he did not show it off. Rather unlike him really. Anyway, this meant that Draco was dedicated to his homework and finished it as soon as he could. Not just for his teachers sake but also, with it out of the way it would be easier for him to prowl around the school thinking up insults without having to worry about homework. After all, his brain couldn't concentrate on two things at once.

So Blaise instead of going to watch the tape with Draco went to the Room of Requirement to see the Twins.

"Have you got a reply yet?" The first words out of Blaises mouth was a question that he had been wanting to ask all day.

"Yes." George said this somberly and Blaise began to deflat. Tomorrow would have been one of his favourite nights. It had the add plus of becoming blackmail material at the end.

"I guess she said no then? Great. How much polyjuice have we got, I guess we can do some of the plan."

"She said...YES!" Big grins all around.

"Seriously?! I mean I thought the whole, being able to screw with her cousin may have clinch it, but this is great! When is she coming?"

"Today. Right now actually. In fact..." Fred was looking over his shoulder, so Blaise turned to see what- who- was there. Tonks. Someone with one of the best blood gifts you could have.

"Well you were right, I couldn't resist a chance to screw over my cousin. Will really annoy my aunt as well. I warn you now though that this goes no further? Understood? Oh and I don't bottom." With that said, tonks went and draped herself across the sofa.

"No Draco will be on the bottom everytime. When did you want to start?"

"I gotta go in an hour and a half, meeting with the Headmaster, so...now?"

Blaise turned to George; "you're first. Fred you set up the camera and I'll prep the room. Who did you want to start with first Tonks?"

"You got Filch on your list?"

The Twins and Blaise just smiled. Tonks was the best woman in the world.

* * *

Blaise returned to the common room at half six only to be dragged out again by Draco.

"I guess you want to go view the tape?" Blaise had an air of Luna-ness around him and was smiling pleasantly as he was being dragged along.

"You think? I came back, finished all my homework and came to find you but I couldn't where have you been? Don't answer, come on! Move! I've got to go to Snapes' at seven."

Blaise and Draco entered the room a few minutes later. It had already been set up with a magi-player and a magi-visionator. So Blaise popped the tape in and relaxed on the sofa, while Draco was on the edge of the seat hands shaking oh so slightly.

"Why isn't it playing?! Blaise! What, do something!" Draco was really getting worked up...

"Chill man, I haven't pressed play yet. Just need to find the remote. Where did it go?" Blaise made a show of looking; down the sides of the sofa, underneath. Dracos eyes widened. "You can't find the remote! What are we going to do!"

"We could press the button on the machine?"

"You can DO that?" Draco was amazed. Buttons ON the machine? Whoa...

Blaise smirked and; push the button. As if by magic- the picture appeared.

There was the dorm, all the bed curtains were closed and there was Albus Dumbledore closing the door to the dorm. The boys watched in silence as Dumble-George moved silently over to Dracos bed. Blaise watched in amusement unlike Draco who was filled with more horror as time passed. Dumble-George worked quickly, applying the cherry cream breasts and gently as he added the lemon drops. Then came the bit that Blaise did not know would happen. Dumble-George sprayed a beard on Draco and made it looked like he had long flowing hair. Blaise bit his lip to try and stop laughing but Draco still heard a squeak of amusement.

"It's not funny! How would you feel if you had a pervy old man leeching and leering at you?" Draco turned back to the film. As did Blaise, who watched as Dumble-George turned Dracos boxers from black plain black to neon green with canary yellow trimming.

Blaise watched as something else he had not planned happened. Dumble-George dropped a note on Dracos bed.

"Draco, what did that note say?"

"You don't need to know."

"We can use it as evidence, now what did it say? Tell me!"

Draco mumbled something incoherent.

"Again?"

"Youth may have speed and energy but old have experience. Perfection therefore, if you combine the two." Draco was starring out of the window and Blaise was stunned.

"I gotta go see Snape. Here's the note, you'll look after it and the tape for me?" Blaise nodded and Draco let the room. Hearing the door click shut Blaise sat in silence before bursting out into laughter. Blaise took a look at the note and indeed it said what Draco had.

'This is better than the time we made that Ravenclaw afraid of books. I am definitely must save these memories. Oh Draco, just wait until tonight. Then the next. Then the next. Oh you will be afraid. I cannot wait.' Blaise did wonder if this was the right thing to do, you know breaking someone because they pulled a mild prank on you. but the Blaise remember he was a Slytherin and therefore was not able to feel guilt. Just like Hufflepuffs never feel selfish, Ravenclaws lazy and Gryffindors scared. Blaise shrugged.

Taking the tape out of the magi-player, Blaise went down to the Kitchens to grab a snack before going to bed early to make up for the sleep he missed yesterday. Remembering to set his alarm for three thirty Blaise feel asleep. Draco entered the dorm thee hours later and crossed himself before also going to bed.

* * *

Should be able to post that nights 'entertainment' tomorrow so it will be a short chapter.  
If you have any time there is a poll please.


	8. Another Pervy Old Man

George and Fred Weasley entered the Slytherin common room at four o'clock in the morning. Waiting for them was Blaise. No words were spoken as Blaise handed the potion to Fred and left the area to return to his dorm. The Twins exchanged a look before Fred downed the potion in one.

George grimaced at his brothers new body. Though, his mind was coming up with new prank ideas thay they could do with a bit more of this persons hair. O the possibilities....

George gave his brother a salute before turning sharply and leaving the common room. Now alone, Fred took a moment to compose himself before following the same route Blaise had a moment before- to the Sixth year boys dorm.

* * *

The wards surrounding Dracos bed went down, seemingly of their own accord. Fred pulled up a chair from the corner of the room and placed it close to Draos bed. Fred spent the rest of the night stroking Draco, touching him- then himself- and just sitting in the chair. Watching. He then pulled out a can of squirty cream and squirted on Dracos chest 'I want you.' As six o'clock came around and the dark night light started lightening Fred stood up, put the chair back where it was and left.

Before he did though, he took a moment to gently kiss Draco on the head before saying one sentence, the only thing he had said all night and finally leaving.

Blaise pushed the blue button and rolled over trying to get an extra half an hour of sleep. Pervy old men indeed....

* * *

Just a short chapter. It was this or nothing at all cause I kinda forgot that I was supposed to update and went out only to return now. Oh well... I updated yesterday didn't I? Actually I am updating more than I thought I would. Might actually finish this story by the end of the month! Shock horror! Le gasp!

There's a poll! Would like some input because at the moment I have four different endings I want to write so...

Drop a review perhaps? Though I do promise never to withhold a chapter due to lack of reviews...I hate authors that do that. 'Tis just not fair. Right I should really close this up.

Next update Wednesday-ish and there will be; whispered sentences revealed! Oh! Another pervy old man! (The children really aren't safe at Hogwarts, either being killed or molested...) ...And incriminating photographs!

Adieu


	9. Not That Bad The Biggest One So Far

Blaise picked up a piece of toast, looked at it, studied it. Then put it down. The other Slytherinslooked on with mild interest. After all, Blaise seemed to have a prank-dar so it was rare for him to get pranked. If Blaise wasn't eating the toast then... The other Slytherins dropped the toast they were preparing to eat and looked around at the other food. Blaise inwardly smirked and waited until everyone had helped themselves to other pieces of breakfast before picking up his toast and taking a big bite.

"Ass." Nott said this shaking his head. He now knew, like the rest of the table, that Blaise was just messing with them. Well they did until...

"AAAHHHH!" A seventh year Slytherin shrieked. "GET THEM OFF ME! HELP!" The seventh year whimpered.

"Mr Worthington what ever is the matter?" The Headmaster stood up, concern etched on his face. Worthington was now rolling around on the floor whimpering and shuddering.

"They're all over me! Get them off, please!" Dumbledore was just about to speak again when;

"Oh my Merlin! Help! Get them off me, NOW!" A fourth year now stood brushing frantically at his body. Soon all the Slytherins were joining in. Running, rolling, brushing trying to get something off. The teachers jut looked on, unable to see anything on the Slytherins. Blaise on the other hand was sat contently at the table eating his toast.

Blaise shook his head, dispelling the daydream. He would have to talk to the Twinsabout coming up with some sort of hallucinogenic and slipping it into the Slytherins breakfast. Or the Hufflepuffs. It would be fun to see them high...

Draco came into the Hall and plonked himself next to Blaise.

"Nothing happened last! I woke up and I was clean, no cream, lemon drops nothing! We'll watch the tape though, just to make sure?" Draco was gazing at Blaise like an eager puppy.

"Sure, half six okay?" Blaise finished his second piece of toast.

"Great! What we got first? Eh, Herbology with Hufflepuffs. Do you know I saw one of them..." Blaise tuned Draco out and thought about tonight. He sort of felt sorry for Draco. After he saw last nights footage... He would be scarred for life. Oh well. Noticing others starting to get up and move Blaise decided it was also time to go. Grabbing a sausage, to shove in Dracos mouth and shut him up, before leaving the Hall slowly to give Draco time to catch up and complain about the effective but crude method employed.

* * *

The day passed in a similar way, the only highlights being a Hufflepuff having to go to the hospital after being strangled by his _'morte corde_,_'_literally translated as 'death rope.' A rather...viscious plant that was used by Greek wizards in the 11thcentury to execute criminals. Worked like being hanged. Except you were strangled to death. They weren't that cruelthough, so the plants were trained to do the job quickly. Well, if you were rich. The poor criminals were slowly strangled and the rich got away with a quick and painless snapped neck. Even got a numbing potion beforehand.

Of course DADA was really interesting. Reading from a book and making notes! Yay! What fun... Blaise and Draco spent the lesson playing noughts and crosses, only pausing when Potter started whining about the lack of practical and how 'the Dark Lord's gonna kill us all unless we prepare!' Of course he is.

Yes, all in all the day went as usual. Lessons, food, sneering at Gryffindors, more lessons, more food, more insults... Then half past six came around and it was time to watch last nights footage.

At first you couldn't tell who it was. They kept to the shadows at first, it was only after they had moved the chair next to Dracos bed did the person get revealed. Draco watch in horror as he was touched, stroked and fawned over. Watched in horror as the person touched themselves... Blaisewas sat confused. One half wanted to laugh, the other gore his eyes out with a spoon.

"I..I can't w-watch this." Draco leaned forward, pressed the fast forward button on the remote. Didn't make it any better, everything just went faster...

"Oh dear Dark. Wait! What was that? He said something!" Blaise grabbed the remote and rewound the tape.

"There! Listen!" Blaise turned the volume up.

"Too bad you had your detention with Professor Snape. Just imagine the fun we could of had. Chained up against the wall. You, me, a can of cream and a whip." He licked his lips, then left the room leaving the watching two stunned and shocked into being speechless.

"Don't worry Draco. We'll sort something out. It's not, not that bad." Blaise lied through his teeth.

"Not _that _bad?!" Draco hissed. "I've been given whipped cream and cherry fucking tits, been molested by Dumbledore and now FELT UP by FILCH! Please Blaise, tell me. How could it be BLOODY WORSE?!"

"Snape could have been there as well?" Draco sobbed and ran from the room, facein his hands. Blaise leaned back against the sofa and slowly worked at moving the memory of last night adventure to the far depths of his mind, where hopefully, it would never surface from.

* * *

Blaise gave a weak smile when he saw the Twins on the way back to the Slytherin common room. They smiled understandingly.

* * *

**I'm so sorry for the delay! First I lost my memory stick which had two chapters on it. I was so happy with those chapters as well... Then a combination of waiting to see if I could find the memory stick, a dash of writers block and a heaping of running out of internet allowance. So I had to wait.**

**We're at Thursday evening now. The time line is only a week long, so Sunday is the big one. Actually I had Sunday planned from the beginning and the rest of the story has been worked from that original idea/ dream.**

**Tally Ho! Sarah.**


	10. Always At The Bottom

The wards dropped. Three people crept closer, their faces were covered by large hoods and the flowing robes gave no indication of height. One figure took out a wand and started muttering, a blue mist sceeped out of its wand. The figure slowly moved the wand cautiously all over the bed leaving a fine blue sheen to the bed. Another took out a well known can of whipped cream and proceeded to apply a sticking charm before getting to work. The last held a folder which they opened and started extracting something from it. The folder was discarded and, when the others had finished their tasks, the things from the folder were handed out. They all had a pile and started pressing them individually down, spread around the bed. Some where stuck to the bed covers, others the the posts and some the the ceiling. It took a long time, each piece had to be held down for ten seconds for it to stick completely and, although there were three of them, there were a lot of photos. Eventually though the entire bed was covered and the figures stepped back. Two saluted the third before turning and leaving the room. The third however gazed thoughtfully at the body currently sleeping in the bed. Its head tilted to the side, contemplating. Finally decide the figure snapped their fingers and a House Elf appeared. Words were whispered and the Elf disappeared again, only to reappear moments later carrying a small bag.

The person moved once again to the bed. Five minutes later he moved back from the bed and into the shadows, disappearing. Well, it looked like that anyway. Blaise cast a disallusioning spell and quietly crept back to bed, smirking all the while.

* * *

The doors flew open, owls scattered, breakfast was dropped and all turned their eyes to a flushed Draco Malfoy who stood in the doorway. Unfortunately, Draco had seemed to forget to get dress this morning as he was still wearing the pyjama bottoms he wore to bed. So Draco was not wearing any shirt of any kind. So everyone saw what was stuck to his chest- in lemon drops.

"Mr Malfoy, why does your chest read, and I quote 'Wanna get creative?'" Draco started blushing, Blaise grinned, it was funny to see how low down the blush would go. Past his ears, down his neck...

"I do not know Headmaster. I woke up like this." Draco stared at the floor.

"Hmm, perhaps it would be prudent for you to say go to and visit Madam Pomfrey? Stopping by the dorms on your way and putting a few pieces of clothing on first?"

"Ten points to Slytherin Mr Malfoy for...for, ah-"

"Going Severus, you can do it. Think now, come on don't give up!"

"For... obviously working hard in being in peak physical condition for your House team?"

Good boy! Well done my boy, I knew you could do it. I am so proud of you!" The Headmaster twinkled at Severus and felt the heat of pride rush through him. The students looked away disinterested. It was well known by now that the Headmaster was constantly encouraging Snape, he said it brought him out of his shell, helped his in social situations and made his more noticeable to the student body. He needn't bothered, they had all noticed what a git he was.

"Why don't you go with young Mr Malfoy Severus and make sure he makes it there safely?" Snape nodded and swiftly left the Hall.

"I guess we know what Snape sees in Draco. You see his abs?"

"Dear brother of mine, how could I not see them? I could bounce on them!"

"Someone obviously does... Wink wink, nudge nudge. A bit of how's your father?"

"Fine, yours?"

"Fred! George! Five points from Gryffindor, follow me we'll arrange your detention now." The Twins grinned and followed their Head of House. The smiles dimmed slightly though when she denied the offer to take their arms.

* * *

"Blaise?" Draco sat down next to Blaise on a couch in the Slytherin common room.

"Yes Draco?"

"Some stuck some stuff to my bed last night."

"And..."

"It was bad."

"How bad?"

"They were photos. Photos of me and people. In, compromising positions."

"Oh."

"Blaise?"

"Have I ever gone missing, for any periods of time recently?"

"No, why?"

"How else would you explain the fact that there are pictures of me, Snape and Filch, doing stuff?"

"Stuff?"

"Bad stuff."

"What so-"

"-Leave it! Just bad okay?"

"Fine! Draco?"

"Yes?!"

"You were on the bottom a lot weren't you?"

"Every time... Every freaking time." Blaise patted Dracos shoulder comfortingly then left. He had homework to do after all.

* * *

**Small one today. I haven't described the photos, but just imagine. Tonks and a polyjuice potion with Dracos hair in it. Pretty unlimited. The 'Wanna get creative?' Was about all the different ways Draco was...portrayed in the photos.**

**Please review! Oh and the poll, at the moment Draco is being sent to Mungos, but I do admit I'd rather wipe his memory and just have people laugh at him. Draco staying at Hogwarts does after all, leave the possibility of future...happenings. **

**Auf wiedersehen!**


	11. Gay Sex and Being The Best

Blaise was open to many things but this, for him, was a _bit too far_. Gay sex? Fine. Girl on girl? Fine. Incest? Kinda no. At the moment, however, this was the only way.

"There is no other way! Who can we find that won't mind having gay sex on top of a Slytherins bed while polyjuiced as, as HIM?!" Blaise was trying to convince himself and the twins. He was currently pacing around the Room of Requirement. It was ten o'clock at night and they had five hours to finalise tonight's entertainment.

"I mean, anyone, male or female, it doesn't matter. George are there any guys you're interested in? Fred any girls?"

"That's the thing Blaise, there are plenty of people that want to have sex with us, but polyjuiced? As _Draco_? I really-"

"-don't think anyone would be that adventurous." By now they were all pacing the room, realising how stupid they most look though, made Blaise stop and go and sit down, followed by the Twins.

"Well, there _is_..." Fred started.

"No! He would never agree."

"Brother he is gay, he does like you and he's always up for laugh."

"I know but. Ergh. I don't know!"

"Who are you guys talking about?" Blaise felt it was time he stepped into the conversation, this night had to happen- well it didn't _have _to, but it was the nearly final stage! They were so close. This would tip the balance.

"Marcus Belby."

"Belby? His uncle invented the Wolfsbane Potion?"

"That's him. In sixth year, Ravenclaw."

"He would do it? And keep quiet about it?"

"Would you admit it if you had sex with-"

"-point taken. Right. Fine, you two go and get him, I'll get the Polyjuice ready. I'll see you two in five then?" Seeing nods of agreement, Blaise turned away and did what he said he would, preparing the two different potions. He finished the Draco one and finished serving up the second one, adding three strands of hair. The potion immediately turned black. Fitting.

* * *

Draco had put up some more wards before he had gone to bed, so Blaise was now taking them back down. Blaise was surprised at the variety, some were rather complex as well. Draco must have been in the library looking some of these up. Blaise froze. That one was quite nasty and nearly untraceable. _That_ did not show up on his scan. Luckily he had done two different scans, Blaise would have hated to walk into that ward. He rather liked his kneecaps and where they were, thank you very much.

Blaise would be glad when all this was over. His sleeping had been disrupted, and he was now only get four, five hours of sleep a night. He had taken to having an afternoon nap straight after lessons and normally caught an hour or two after watching the tapes with Draco. Though, sleeping wasn't really the best thing to do after watching those tapes.

He finally managed to bring down all the wards and make the bed safe to new comers, just in time as it was coming up to three anyway. Blaise climbed into bed and waited, running over the plan in his head. They would come in, do the deed, 'Draco' would say the key phrase and Blaise would wait thirty seconds before pushing the blue button and end the filming.

It went as planned. 'Draco' and his friend made their way slowly to the bed, stopping on the way to press up against bedposts, stealing kisses. They both fell onto the bed, the kissing never stopping, clothes were ripped off, sweet words whispered. Draco was pushed on to his knees, his friend pushing himself up behind him.

Blaise had to listen. He had to wait for his cue. Though, just because he had to, that did not mean he liked it. Soft moans and grunts were heard and Blaise nearly laughed out loud when 'Draco' started really getting into his role calling out his lovers name. Blaise stuffed his fist into his mouth, he must not laugh! Finally he heard his cue; "YOU. ARE. THE. BEST!"

Draco and his friend left, leaving disheveled bed-covers and a unsuspecting Draco behind.

* * *

Sorry for the delay~ I've been revising for once. There's a poll! Go, find, be opinionated etc... Review please. I admit, I am part of the 'Review-Tarts Anonomous' group.


	12. SubConscious Urges

**Sub-conscious Urgings**

In the morning Draco looked a bit spooked- he complained about his covers being more disturbed than usual but was quickly rebuffed by scornful looks. Blaise, like usual, slightly ignored Draco and went about his routine leaving the common room, as usual, before most people in his House. Blaise was normally one of the first people to arrive in the Great Hall and was part of the early risers club at Hogwarts. Nothing was entailed with being in this club, it merely meant that they all greeted each other- Blaise, being a Slytherin, received a nod- and if they were passing in the halls they would normally catch each other eye. They weren't friends; it was more a mutual respect. Though why someone would be respectful because you got up at the same time as them I don't know.

Gradually the Hall filled up and everyone was eating breakfast- even Draco had managed to enter the room and eat without making some sort of spectacle of himself. Strange...

"...I mean I did question twelve easily but then question thirteen! How are we supposed to know the spell for turning a block of cheese to stone? When would we need to know such a spell anyway? It makes no sense. What we really need is, instead of all these individual spells, just a single spell that will turning anything stone to wood. You know? And did you see her? Getting all worked up because everyone was having trouble with the reversion spell? Again, just one simple spell that could cancel transfiguration is what we need."

"I know, she came up and told me I was pronouncing the last part wrong. You must say 'caROba' not 'carOBa.' Seriously, when would I need to turn a piece of cheese that's been turned into stone back into cheese? I think that..."

Blaise let the conversation flow over him. His mind was too busy working out the plan for tomorrow to be concentrating on a conversation that _had _been repeated and, no doubt, _would_ be repeated in the future. The only problem with tomorrow he was having was with a certain Harry Potter. Unlike Draco, Potter only struck back, _never_ first. So Potter was unlikely to help him, but if the Twins asked? Blaise mused on and time passed on, soon it was time for double DADA and Blaise's musing had to be cut short.

"Come on, we'd better go." Blaise discarded what was left of his breakfast and followed the rest of the Slytherin fifth years out of the Hall; unfortunately Potter and his friends were also leaving at the same time, meaning that both groups met at the bottom of the stairs. Weasley merely glared at Draco and Granger ignored the Slytherins entirely, Potter spared a quick glance towards the group but carried on walking. This wasn't good enough for Draco however, who was bored and arrogant and had to cause trouble any way he could.

"Hey Scarhead! Is it true?"

"Is what true Malfoy?" Potter had paused and turned around, Weasley and Granger framing him on either side, the rest of the students started walking slowly around the group, giving them space.

"That you've offered to help the Weasels pay for their bills, that you and they have got some sort of 'arrangement'." Confusion was showing on the Gryffindor's faces- Blaise however knew where this was going along with the other Slytherins, who had started sharing looks and smirks. Nott snickered.

Draco sauntered forward closing the gap between them, Crabbe and Goyle following dutifully.

"We've been hearing that you, Saint Potter, are helping the Weasels in return for a plaything. The youngest Weasel, the Weaselette. For something to play with I guess she's alright. Blood traitors, at least, are good for something."

This was too much for Ron who understood exactly what Malfoy was implying. He surged forward with his fists raised only to crash into Crabbe and Goyle who had moved to meet him. Potter pulled out his wand while Ron thrashed about trying to free himself.

"I'll kill you Malfoy! You bloody ponce!" Ron was close to foaming at the mouth and Draco was wearing a full blown smirk, secure in the knowledge that Crabbe and Goyle would be able to hold him back. Potter on the other hand was unrestrained and he raised his wand, intent on hexing the blond when a hand suddenly grasped his arm and pulled it violently down.

"Enough." This wasn't said particularly loudly but it needn't be. Snape had arrived and his glare was aimed at everyone.

"What is going on here?" Potter opened his mouth to reply but was cut short by Draco.

"Potter and Weasley started attacking us, sir."

Snape's lips curled and an eyebrow was raised; "Is that so? Brawling in the corridors, something which is strictly forbidden. Weasley, Potter- detention. I will see you two tonight at seven. The rest of you, _move_! You have lessons to go to, do you not?" The students scattered and Draco sauntered past Potter smirking all the while.

Perfect, thought Blaise. Draco had just given Potter a reason to play along; Draco was helping to prank himself.

* * *

The video was playing and Blaise and Draco were sat on the sofa, Blaise was relaxed and looked indifferent, Draco though was sat on the very edge of the seat with wide eyes and an open mouth. The video finished.

"Well that was alright then." Blaise said as he stood up and proceeded to remove the video for the player.

"Alright?! What are you talking about? There I was, on my bed! I was having sex on my bed with Snape!" Blaise turned sharply towards Draco.

"When?" Draco looked outraged.

"There, on that blasted tape!" He yelled, pointing at said tape, "Snape and I having sex, while I was asleep!"

"Snape was molesting you while you slept?"

"No! Snape and I were having sex while I was awake but I was also lying there sleeping!"

"Draco, so far you've said that you were awake and having sex with Snape at the same time as being asleep. Which one is it? You can't be awake and asleep at the same time, well not as far as I'm aware of anyway."

"No, you don't understand! There were _two_ of me." Draco acted like this explained everything.

"There were two of you?"

"Yes!"

"Draco, I also just watched that video and I only saw one of you, one of you merely sleeping, nothing more nothing less."

"But, I- we were right there! Having sex! Didn't you hear? There were moans and groans and stuff."

"Squidgy noises?" Blaise inquired.

"Yes! So you did hear!"

"No, I was just wondering." Blaise smirked.

"Blaise, I am telling you, I just watched a video of Snape and I having sex. You have to believe me."

"Draco, these past few days have been very stressful, what with the other tapes and all our school work. Not to mention your patrols. Maybe you're not getting enough sleep and have started, well _seeing_ things."

"That's not true, there must be another explanation!"

"The only other one I good think of is that your sub-conscience is telling you that you secretly want to have sex with Snape. Well?"

"Maybe you're right. I have been working hard..." Draco rubbed his forehead and shook his head.

"I'll see you later Blaise." He left the room leaving Blaise alone. Well, except for...

"That was wicked mate!"

"I agree, simply spiffing," The Twins appeared from behind a screen.

"The silly chap must think he's losing it!"

"He must. Hey, don't you two have detention?" The Twins paled and quickly left the room leaving Blaise alone, completely though this time.

* * *

**Next Wednesday there will be another update even if I have to beta it myself.**

**I'd like to thank ThatGirlCanRock for beta'ing this, scubarang- an amazing D/G writer- for reminding me to chase up this chapter, and Mihra for giving me something to beta so I don't forget how to type. Check them both out. **

**That's the first and only time I will ever do a plug.**

**You should know about the poll by now. There are only a couple of chapters left- the fifteenth shall be the last I think- so the ending of the poll will be coming soon. **

**Reviews are appreciated- no they're mandatory and I will reply to you, even if I know you and converse with you, (that's a hint Mihra). **

**_.net/u/1409807/scubarang  
_****_.net/u/1939932/Mihra-Attar_**


	13. You Know You Want To I Know You Do

At six o'clock in the morning, on a very clear and sunny Saturday, Blaise Zabini could be seen sneaking _in to_the Slytherin common room. Today, Blaise was able to get a unbroken session of sleep, only having to wake up at five to deal with today's _entertainment_. As it was a Saturday, most of the student population of Hogwarts were sleeping in late. So, after getting up at five and entering his dorm at a little past six, Blaise had to get undressed and climb back into bed, which he did.

After a power nap, Blaise was back up at nine, ready to let in this morning's guests. Fortunately, there would be no problems from the other Slytherins, Blaise had cleared it with them last night, and everyone had agreed. Draco was getting a _bit too_comfortable with his position in Slytherin. It was time to take him down a peg or two, and if this 'taking down' was born from the need to continue a prank, then so be it. While waiting for the knock on the entrance, Blaise had a moment of free thought, and decided to relive last night's conversation, just for the hell of it.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*FREE*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*THOUGHT*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*FLASHBACK*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Draco was talking to Snape about the Potions homework; Draco was planning on achieving a Potion mastery so wanted to do as well as he could on the O.W.L.s- he was hoping to get the top marks. This, therefore, was the perfect time for Blaise to have a quick word with his fellow housemates.

The Slytherins were spread around the common room. Some were doing homework, but most were merely relaxing on the sofas, talking with friends. Blaise walked around until he was standing on the large balcony-library that surrounded one side of the room. He stood in the middle of it, looking out over the others. Eventually, people noticed his presence and sensing that he had something to say to them, something that would concern them, they quietened down. Blaise waited a moment, taking his time. He waited until everyone was waiting and watching, using the time to formulate his thoughts.

"Malfoy. He has a very _bold _presence. When the rest of the school see him, they think of us. Malfoy's loud and, dare I say it, brash manner has started making _us_, look like fools. As you all know, Malfoy annoyed me recently and I have been taking actions against him. Tomorrow I am bringing two people here," the Slytherins started to waver and many started to whisper furiously to their neighbour. Blaise spoke over them. "They will be under Polyjuice and they are helping me take my 'actions'. At the end of this week, Draco Malfoy will no longer be strutting about. However, this change will not last forever, he will soon revert to being the Malfoy he is-," At this there was a spread of snickers, "but, we will have a respite from him, and hopefully he will be more reserved. Does anyone have any questions?"

A tall seventh year immediately stood up.

"Who are these people? You're telling them where our common room is, if they're willing to help you against Malfoy, what's stopping them from pranking all of us?" Many voiced their agreement; the seventh year had summed up what most of them were thinking.

"They knew where the common room was be-" Loud shouts were exclaimed then; many people calling out 'traitor' and threats were passed.

"If you would let me finish!" Blaise raised his voice by little, but everyone could hear the barely contained rage behind it. Blaise hated being interrupted, especially now because if they_ had_ let him finish, they never would have voiced their previous statements and threats.

"These people knew where the common room was, I never told them. They described the way to get down here and described the portrait guarding us. They will not be told the password, I will let them in. I will be with them all the time; they will never be left on their own. Are there any more concerns?"

The Slytherins looked amongst themselves and deciding that they had no more concerns, silence reigned.

"They will be coming at nine; they will leave with us when we approach the Great Hall. I do not think I need to say this but while they are here, you should pretend that you do not see them, nor hear them. For us, they must be invisible." Just as Blaise finished the portrait door opened and Draco strolled in.

"I didn't know there was a meeting," was all Draco said as he took in the group of Slytherins.

"The Weasley twins have booby trapped the entire fourth floor, I was letting everyone know." Blaise's lie rolled straight off of his tongue. He left the balcony and walked down the stairs, joining Draco. Together they left the common room and went to their dorm.

"Bloody Weasels. I don't know why they haven't been expelled yet. Must be Dumbledork trying to keep all his Blood Traitors happy and-"

*~*~*END*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*OF*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*FREE*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*THOUGHT*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*FLASHBACK*~*~*~*~*

A knock at the door snapped Blaise out of his musings. A lot of the Slytherins were in the common room casually waiting. Pretending to be involved in other things, they were watching and waiting, trying to imagine who the 'people' would come Polyjuiced as. A few were unsurprised when the door was opened and the two entered. One striding and the other strolling. Snape and Malfoy. Amused smiles were on faces and many were wondering what would happen to them if Snape found out. Then they started wondering why this duo? What was special about these two? Sure, seeing a clone of himself would freak Draco out, but where did Snape come into it?

Blaise led the two up the stairs, towards the dorm room. Inside Crabbe and Goyle were still asleep, as was Draco. Nott was up and was getting dressed, watching the three with interest. After a pointed look from Blaise however, he got back to getting dressed and ignored the three.

Another pointed look at the Polyjuiced duo sent them off to do their task. Blaise himself went and lay on his bed and picked up the book that was on his bedside table, and opening it to a random page, he began to read.

Although Blaise had warned him to ignore that mornings happens, Nott still had to look up in disbelief when he started hearing springs twang. He carried on watching Snape and Malfoy as they jumped on Draco's bed until a cough from Blaise broke him out of his amazement, Nott once more returned to preparing himself for the day.

"What the heck? AHH!" Draco had sat up warily, but after registering what he was seeing happening on his bed, he jumped up and scooted backwards as far and as quickly as possible. Blaise took his eyes off of his book and looked across to Draco.

"What is it? A _nightmare_? Could you, if possible, keep it down? Some of us are trying to read." Blaise narrowed his eyes at Draco before 'returning' to his book.

Snape and Malfoy picked up some pillows that had been, strangely enough, left lying at the foot of Draco's bed, they then proceeded to hit each other- Snape and Malfoy were having a pillow fight.

"Blaise..." Draco's worried whisper was heard across the room. Exhaling a large breath of exasperation Blaise closed his book definitely and rested it in his lap. He slowly looked up to Draco.

"_Yes Draco?_" Blaise sounded annoyed at the constant interruptions to his reading.

Draco ignored all this and concentrated on the two _things_ that had finally stopped fighting and were instead, just, well, _staring_ at each other.

"Draco!"

Nott closed his bedside drawer and left the room. Crabbe and Goyle slept on.

"Can you _see _them?" Draco was staring at the two; they were staring at each other.

"Yes."

Draco's head snapped up. "You can?! What, I mean, who?"

"Yes Draco, I can see dead people. They're terribly uninteresting, well, until they try to hurt you. Then they're annoying." Blaise was looking straight at Draco and ignoring the pair of people that were starting to fall into each other.

"Blaise! This isn't time for jokes, can you see them?" At this Draco gestured to the pair, also turning his head back to them. He quickly looked away and tried to move away but unfortunately the bed wasn't big enough.

Blaise watched as Draco picked himself up from the floor.

"Is there a reason why you threw yourself to the floor? Or did you 'just feel like it'?"

"They're kissing! I'm kissing Snape! Look! Parted lips and everything and, and... No! No, no, no, no, no! Please no!" Draco's eyes had grown wide and he fell back to the floor, hugging his knees to his chest. Draco shook his head, unable to tear his eyes away at the spectacle before him.

Blaise raised an eyebrow.

"Is this your subconscious desire to shag Snape manifesting to create hallucinations depicting you kissing Snape? With tongue?" Blaise sounded slightly sceptical.

"You know you want to."

As Blaise waited for an answer, watching Draco's face flash through emotions, Draco stood up and backed away even further from the bed, falling into a comfortable leather chair.

"Ww..what?" Draco managed to stutter out.

"I'm you Draco. I know what you want, I know _who_you want." The Draco clone bit his bottom lip and turned away from Snape, landing on all fours facing Draco.

"You want it Draco, you want _him_. You've thought about it- I know you have. Go and try it Draco, go taste it! I have, and look how happy I am." With this Malfoy turned back to Snape who had all the while been removing his outer robes, revealing that he was wearing no shirt and only boxers underneath. Malfoy pushed Snape back on to the bed and straddled him, kissing his lips and slowly kissing lower and lower- Snape's hands were entangled in Malfoy's hair and Malfoytook his hand and lowered it down, getting ready to grasp-

"Draco! Can. You. Hear. Me?" Blaise cut in, enunciating each individual word. He had left his bed and had moved over to Draco, he was now waving a hand in front of his face, trying to attract Draco's attention.

"Draco?" Snape moaned; Malfoy giggled and Draco screamed. Crabbe's snoring froze before resuming, and Goyle rolled over.

Suddenly Draco bounded over to the- now locked- door. He tried to fling it open but failed. Draco ran back to his bed and grabbed his wand and once more ran back to the door. A quick spell and the door was unlocked and Draco was free.

Unfortunately for Draco, the locked door and Draco having to run back and forth- clad only in pyjama bottoms- had given Blaise enough time to reach the door and Snape and Malfoy enough time to untangle themselves and follow him.

The upper year dorms were located up the stairs, just off of the balcony library that surrounded the far side of the common room. So, when Draco Malfoy ran out of his room and into the common room he was in full view of everyone in the room. When Blaise came out calmly, following, he too was visible. Many eyebrows were raised at the thought of what the Zabini heir and friends had done to make Draco so... undignified. They soon found out.

Following the other two, Snape and Malfoy stumbled out of the dorm as well. Snape was naked, except for his boxers; Malfoy was- like Draco was- wearing plain grey pyjama bottoms.

Draco ran down the stairs with Blaise continuing to follow. Snape and Malfoy however, stopped at the top of the stairs. Malfoy was leant against the railing and Snape was standing, protectively, behind him.

"Don't run away from our love Draco! You know you want it! Just come back to bed, there's plenty of room for all of us." Malfoy let out a very un-Malfoy like giggle as Snape began nibbling his ear. Wide eyes watched them.

"No! No, no, no, no, no! Go away!" Draco screamed at the two.

A sixth year, Roger Roy, stood up, fake concern lining his face. "Malfoy? What's wrong with you?" Draco spun round to face him; his eyes were crazy and his hair dishevelled.

"Nothing! Them!" He pointed at the two.

"Who? There's _no one_ there."

"He's being nibbled by Snape! How can you not see that?" The nibbling stopped.

"If you'd rather I nibbled _you_, I'd gladly oblige." Snape grabbed Malfoy's hand and together they walked- shimmied- down the stairs. They had almost reached Draco when he ducked and, protecting his head with his arms, ran back up to the dorm, the noise of the door slamming resounding throughout the common room. No one laughed, not wanting to alert Draco to something being up. They just all watched the three boys- well, boys and man- who were now standing at the entrance.

"I think we're done for the day." Snape said, turning to the two.

"Yes, I do believe you are correct. Here," Blaise handed two potions over, "take these and I'll see you later." Snape and Malfoy nodded to the Slytherins before leaving the room. Blaise took one last look around at them all before saying;

"I'll see you at breakfast then?" Then leaving, for breakfast.

* * *

Snape and Malfoy ran away from the Slytherin common room and entered an abandoned classroom that was towards the top of the dungeons and near the Great Hall. Here they downed their potions and changed- _put _some clothes on. They vanished the now empty bottle before leaving the classroom, their bright ginger hair appearing as they ascended the stairs and entered the Great Hall.

* * *

Snape was confused. He didn't show it, but he was worried nonetheless. There was something going on in Slytherin. None of them had looked at him once without blushing or looking away quickly and nervously. Due to the looks, sniggers and snickers he was getting, Snape thought he must be the butt of a joke. Reminding himself to leave it and check it out later, Snape ran his gaze across the Slytherin table.

* * *

Blaise finished his last piece of toast and looked around him. The Slytherins were not ignoring him, but they were giving him all the room he wanted. Blaise smirked.

* * *

Apart from the unusually large space around Zabini, the table was normal. Except... Except someone- Malfoy- was missing.

"Tea, Severus?" Albus Dumbledore inquired from his right.

"No thank you Headmaster, I have my coffee."

"Very well, Severus, I was wondering if..." Before becoming fully engaged in the conversation, Snape filed the absence in his mind and made a note to seek out Draco later and ask him about it. Yes, he would go along to the common room tonight and ask him to come back to his office for a chat.

* * *

**This chapter was exactly 2,500 words long- not including this AN. **

**Thank you to my beta ThatGirlCanRock for going though this. **

**Supposedly there are two chapters left until the end, so with that in mind, can you please go and be opinionated on my poll? I have cookies to give out...**

**Thanks for reading and an extra big thank you to those of you that take a moment to review.**

**Sarah.**


	14. You're A Friend

Hogwarts students learnt about glamour charms in their fifth year, but towards the end of it. Most glamour charms were simple once mastered but there were so many, that did so much. For this reason after the O. students would spend the last couple of weeks at school learning about them in general before studying them in depth in the sixth year. Fred and George Weasley had, apparently, picked up the charms so quickly and with such ease Flitwick would look to them whenever he had needed a demonstration in class. If it wasn't for their good, but not great, skills in other areas of charms he would have declared them to be a Charms genius years ago. Unbeknownst to the short Charms professor it was neither the Twins skill nor his teaching talents. The Twins had found out quite quickly that glamour charms opened up a whole new area of pranking; thus, by the end of their second year the Twins had mastered a few of the basic and most used charms, learning more and becoming more adept as the years went by. Blaise had also mastered some of the basics, but had not studied them as diligently as the Twins. Whereas the Twins would use the charms themselves, Blaise was a manipulator, rather than a full out do-er.

Blaise's skills at glamour charms, however, were not put to the test. Unlike the Twins he spent most of his time with Draco, and Draco would soon see the correlation between his disappearance and the reappearance of another. The Twins never spent any time with Draco; apart from passing him in the corridors they never saw him except for at meals. If Draco didn't see them during the day he would think nothing of it.

All of the Slytherins had come to the understanding that if they saw something strange, especially around Draco, they were to ignore it. The rest of the school had noticed by now that something weird was happening in Slytherin, something concerning Draco Malfoy. Gryffindor was the last House to catch on.

* * *

The Whomping Willow wasn't the only defensive tree that existed at Hogwarts. Along the lake's edge, near to the rocky mountain that was near Hogwarts, was Exploding Edmund. Exploding Edmund had been created by a Slytherin seventh year who had an _interest_ in _defensive_ plants. He was able to create Exploding Edmund early in his seventh year. He grew the plant in Greenhouse 12, a greenhouse set aside for N.E.W.T Herbology students; because part of their final exam included presenting a plant they had grown and tended for by themselves. By early winter however, the plant was straining against its pots and Edmund decided to plant it on Hogwarts grounds, though far enough away from the castle and other used places to keep it safe and to keep others safe from _it_. By the summer exam session Edmund's tree had grown to a height of eleven and a half metres and wowed the examiners.

The current headmaster of Hogwarts saw no need to have the tree removed as all it seemed to do was make the odd noise occasionally. It wasn't until some mercenaries decided to come and plunder Hogwarts did anyone realise what the tree's real purpose was.

Exploding Edmund was based on a normal muggle tree, the Sandbox tree. This tree catapults its ripe seeds up to one hundred metres. Edmund liked the possibilities of this tree very much.

When the thieves came through the mountains and started to walk along the edge of the lake, the tree -after somehow recognising their negative intentions,- started releasing its seeds. Unfortunately, this tree had been designed as a defensive tree and did not just release a few seeds, but released a large amount, all at a very fast speed. Out of six plunderers; four died; one became brain dead; the last one was lucky and was merely knocked out. He had tripped and knocked himself out, and most people agreed that was the only way he was still alive.

Edmund, now twenty six, was immediately called back to Hogwarts to try and remove this aggressive feature. Edmund walked away with a headache when the tree decided it liked all of its features and had fired a number of seeds at him.

Eventually it was decided to leave the tree alone, and caution students about venturing near. Edmund had tried to explain that the tree would only hurt those who wished to harm Hogwarts but a zero-tolerance policy was adopted instead. Thus, the tree was left alone and renamed 'Exploding Edmund'. When the next generation of students came to Hogwarts, it was the Eckleston twins, the children of Edmund, who ignored the warnings and used Exploding Edmund for shade. Soon their fellow Slytherins realised that the tree wouldn't hurt them and the tree became a place where only Slytherins ventured. Or the odd drunk Gryffindor. The latter of which was gently pushed away by the tree firing some soft seeds at them.

And so it was a small group of Slytherin fifth years who could be found underneath the tree on one cold wintery afternoon. With two weeks left until the Christmas holidays, the teachers had decided that the break was the perfect time to give the fifth year students more homework than they could carry home. Most of the Slytherins had busy plans over the holidays so were spending most of their time on this homework. The library was crowded and the common room was full of _festive_ first years. The fifth years, having wanted peace and quiet, had ventured outside, as most other people were staying inside because of the cold. The Slytherins however, remembered they were pure-bloods and not muggles and wrapped themselves in warming charms; Millicent even brought along her heated ground blanket. A blanket they were all now relaxed on, trying to work out what would happen if you followed the directions to a Wit-Sharpening Potion backwards.

"Maybe it could be something simple, like a Wit-Dulling solution?" Millicent suggested hopefully.

"No, the powdered Hawthorn just doesn't work like that, if you took that out, maybe, but with it still in the potion. No chance." Draco shot that idea down immediately. He was getting annoyed, Draco wanted to be the best in their year, yet he was having trouble over what Snape had called _'a very simple answer.'_

"Draught of Living Death?" Theodore Nott suggested.

"No! Living Death doesn't even involve any blood in its creation; the Wit-Sharpening requires three different kinds!" Draco was starting to get slightly hysterical now. They had been trying to work out the answer all afternoon now and they were no closer.

"An explosion?" Blaise drawled, thoroughly bored.

Draco sat up and was about to berate Blaise when his mouth fell shut and a contemplating look fell over his face. Suddenly he let out a short laugh, paired with a slow shake of his head. "The bastard. An explosion. Of course, it was a trick question!" Draco picked up his quill and wrote in his answer, quickly followed by the others.

"Right, the next question I-" Draco was quick to start on the next homework question but suddenly cut off. Blaise thought he might have stopped because Snape had appeared right next to him.

"I believe I said that this homework was to be completed individually, Mr Malfoy?"

"Professor Snape! I'm sorry sir, we just-" Draco had jumped up and was trying to come up with an excuse but froze as Snape suddenly lunged forward and began nibbling his ear.

"I did say I'd gladly nibble you. Unfortunately, cheating is not allowed at Hogwarts. So I am going to have to _punish_ you. Often."

Draco turned to face his friends on the blanket. "Help me!" He pleaded, eyes wide in shock and horror.

Millicent quirked an eyebrow, "Help you with what, Draco?"

Draco pointed at Snape and got confused with the blank looks he was returned with. However, when Draco turned around to face Snape again there was no one there.

"He's, he's gone." Draco stuttered.

"Who has gone?" The group chorused and then exchanged a strange look at the coincidence.

"Snape, he was-." Draco didn't finish.

"Oh Merlin, not Snape again." Blaise said.

The others looked at him in confusion.

"Draco has a subconscious desire to screw Snape and keeps imagining him touching him." Blaise shuddered. "It has gone too far now Draco. Just go and see him or something- no, go and find someone and let them 'occupy your time'."

"I do not want to have sex with Snape!" Draco protested, his face taking on a faint pink tinge.

Blaise huffed and turned away from him, returning to his homework, the others following his lead. Draco stood uncomfortably alone for a moment before muttering;

"I do not want to screw Snape." His one final protest before joining the others on the blanket.

* * *

Blaise, Draco and Millicent were currently walking to the Library to take out some books they needed to reference for a piece of Charms homework. They were walking, until Millicent stopped suddenly in the middle of the hallway.

"What's wrong Bulstrode?" Draco asked indifferently.

"I promised Nott I would help him with some Herbology, I'd better go back to the common room."

Draco looked a tad confused at the thought of helping someone, before his face cleared and he asked;

"What's in it for you?"

Millicent merely smirked. "Never you mind Malfoy, just know it's worth my time." With that, Millicent turned away from the duo and walked back to the common room.

Blaise shrugged at the questioning look in Draco's eyes and continued down the hallway. There were just passing a picture of John the Sexist when Snape passed them by. Blaise carried on looking straight ahead, and kept walking. Draco, however, froze and stopped walking.

Well. He tried to walk, but he was pressed up against the wall, with Snape's arms on either side of him, trapping him.

"Hello Draco." He whispered breathlessly. "It's a shame we couldn't have played by the lake. We could, if you want, go outside later? For a little _play_? Well, I say _little..._" Snape trailed off, the suggestive glint in his eye making up for the lack of words.

"Get off me!" Draco cried, and pushed Snape away.

Snape stumbled back, before standing up tall and whipping the hair out of his face. "If you want to play rough Draco," he drawled, "it can easily be arranged." Snape turned around and stalked away.

"Draco? Draco!" Blaise called.

"Huh? What?" Draco snapped out of his funk and faced Blaise.

"I've been calling your name for the past couple of minutes. You were completely out of it."

Draco frowned. "But-" he started, before realising that he was safer not saying.

"But what?" Blaise asked, eyes narrowing.

Draco averted his eyes. "Nothing. Let's just go." Draco said as he pushed away from the wall and headed off.

Blaise smiled.

* * *

As they left the library Draco stopped walking again. He was thrown against the wall and pinned. Draco saw himself get pinned- by himself. Blaise, of course, _didn't see anything._

Draco didn't even ask if Blaise saw.

* * *

They were walking down the stairs when Draco went flying, landing on the landing, sprawled out with his hands firmly held above his head. Blaise didn't ask why Draco's shirt was unbuttoned.

Draco clutched his robes tightly around him and didn't say a word.

* * *

They were in the corridor that led to the Slytherin common room when Snape and Draco, pulled _Draco_ into an alcove. When Draco finally emerged, hair tussled, shirt untucked and a large pink love bite on his neck, Blaise merely raised a questioning eyebrow, which was steadily ignored by Draco.

Blaise didn't mention catching sight of Snape and Draco leaning out of the alcove with smug expressions on their faces, when he and Draco walked away.

Draco didn't ask.

Blaise didn't tell.

* * *

All the other boys were asleep when Blaise and Draco climbed into bed. Draco had been quiet and jumpy all the night. Blaise had just blown his candle out when Draco's voice pierced the night's silence.

"Blaise?"

"Yes Draco?"

"I think something is wrong with me." Draco confessed.

"You want to go and see Pomfrey tomorrow?"

"Maybe. You're a good friend Blaise."

Blaise closed his eyes. He knew that this prank wasn't going to hurt Draco forever, but part of him still wanted to call it off. Draco was really one of the only people he could call a friend. And Draco was the first _friend_, Blaise had pranked like this.

Blaise shook his head and closed the emotion away. One more day. Just one. Draco was strong. He could survive one more day.

"Goodnight Draco." Blaise whispered.

* * *

**Sorry for the ah, slight delay. I've been trying to write at least a chapter a week- of any story. Chapter fourteen. That means one to go. Only one. Maybe an epilogue after that. Who knows? I do because I've actually written a plan for once. **

**Anyway, at the moment Draco is going to be going to Mungos. If you don't like this decision then go and be opinionated and vote on the poll! **

**Sarah.**


	15. Shady Deals and PVC Spanking

Blaise had noticed that recently Harry Potter was arriving at breakfast earlier and earlier each day, and that with each day his appearance was getting more and more haggard. It looked as if Potter was having trouble sleeping.

It was Sunday and the final day of the week spent pranking Draco. This last day was not as bad as the others in Blaise's opinion, but was certainly more difficult to pull off. Whereas the other days were rather simple in executing, today's relied on more people and parts of it were out of Blaise's direct control. Instead of being a small affair, with just himself and the twins, today Blaise had people all across the school helping with the plan.

One of those people was sat on the opposite side of the hall to him, all by himself. Blaise finished his drink and wandered over unnoticed, something that was soon changed when he sat down and coughed.

Harry Potter was suddenly shaken from his reverie and looked up, surprised, at the Slytherin in front of him.

Blaise shuffled in closer and propped his head up with his arm. Smiling languidly, he waited until Potter had gathered his wits before leaning in and saying; "Good morning Potter. Someone mentioned you may be able to help me."

* * *

Joyce barrelled down the hall, and didn't pause for a moment as she was carried closer and closer to the wall at the end of the corridor. She didn't even blink as she passed through it and burst out on the other side. She kept up her speed until she reached a portrait of Maximus the Elder Son- there she grounded to a halt and collected her breath before knocking on the heavy wooden door next to the portrait.

She only had to wait a few seconds before the door was opened, revealing a flustered Professor Flitwick.

"Miss Bocham? Can I help you?"

"Yes sir!" Joyce cried, flinging herself past the short teacher and into his office. She took a seat as the startled teacher shut the door after her.

Flitwick sat down in his own chair and looked at the girl who now seemed close to tears. "What is it my dear?" he asked gently, completely unprepared for the flood of tears that came forth after his inquiry.

"It's my rabbit, Flopsy!" Joyce managed to splutter in between cries.

Flitwick massaged his forehead before delving in to comforting the young girl. "There there, tell me what's the matter."

* * *

"I quite agree, the Gryffindor team is and has always been strong, but you'll see Minerva, my Puffs are coming on leaps and bounds. You won't know what's hit you! Well, you will, it'll be one of those Bludgers sent your way by one of my crack shot Beaters!" Professor Sprout let out a bellowing laugh, pleased with the pained look that crossed her colleague's face.

"Really now Pomona, there is no need to get that hopeful. After all, your Beaters may be good but I've still got the Weasley twins _and_ Harry Potter."

"Not if Dolores has her way." Sprout said quietly as she stole a look at McGonagall's face.

McGonagall sighed. "She really is going at him, isn't she?"

"You know what she's been sent here to do, and she is certainly enjoying it."

"And being extreme! Luckily she's the DADA professor."

Professor Sprout frowned. "I don't inderstand."

Here McGonagall gave a tight lipped smile. "Well, in true Hogwarts tradition, the DADA teacher won't be here next year."

The two cackled and were about to continue their conversation when they heard an almighty crash and shouting on the floor below. They exchanged worried looks before heading to the scene.

* * *

The two Weasley twins had waited until their target had broken away from the crowd and was walking alone down a hallway rarely used. They had begun trailing him and were being quite serious about it. They didn't speak and tried to be as quiet as possible. It was just as they were following him around a corner, that they realised they hadn't been careful enough.

George ploughed into Fred as the latter froze, a wand digging into his chest.

"What do you two want?" their target hissed, his eyes narrowing as he backed away.

The twins held their hands up in mock surrender. "Hey, hey, hey. Chill, relax. We've got a little proposition for you."

"Yeah mate, no harm, no worries." The other twin chimed in.

The boy didn't lower his wand but he did straighten up. He continued to look at the two suspiciously.

"You two have been watching me all night. I thought I might have been wrong, but when you started following me down here… Again, what do you want? I'll warn you though, I'll curse you if you make one wrong move and I have friends who would be happy to do the same."

The twins took a step back and put their hands down.

"Look, we want to do a deal. We need your help." George replied.

"A deal?"

"Yes, a deal. You're one of the best brewers in the school and we need a potion made fast and perfectly." Fred piped up.

"One of?"

"Snape, Twosuals and Patterson being the others," was the answering reply.

"Ahh. You two are up to something which involves Snape, so you can't use Twosuals and Patterson as they'll go straight to him, both needing to be on his good side for potion references. But as a third year I don't need to worry about that, and of course, with my family I won't need to find a job."

"Actually, we've come to you for your skill." George tried to flatter the shorter, younger boy.

"Nonsense. Patterson's a Gryffindor- you'd ask him if you could, and Twosuals is a Hufflepuff. There's no way you would come and ask a Slytherin with those two as options. What potion?" the Slytherin asked suddenly, as if as an afterthought.

"Oh you know. The usual."

"So you would like me to brew you a cauldron of 'usual'?" the boy asked sarcastically.

Fred looked annoyed and was only held back by his brothers warning hand.

"Listen Cufbridge, we don't want to ask you but we have to. We need you to make us a potion that will burn through a stone floor."

Cufbridge quickly hid his shock and licked his lips nervously. "That sort of potion..." Cufbridge paused before continuing, "Snape would know who could have done it- he'd soon find out it was me. No, no way, Weasleys." He started walking away, and it was only George's call that stopped him in his tracks.

"Zabini said you'd want to help us!"

Cufbridge spun back around. "He's calling it in?" he asked.

George shrugged. "I'm just saying what he told us."

Cufbridge leant against the wall and stared at George. Sighing, he said: "Send me your trial products when you create them, I'll get them tested for you, here. Also, you know what my family does, if your business ever gets large enough and you need to outsource some of your potion brewing, come to us."

The twins shared a look. The first request they'd be happy to agree to, it was mutually beneficial, but the other one…

"That's, that's quite…"

"I know, but this potion… well, there are so many uses for it-whatever you're using it for isn't good."

"I don't know. Fred?"

"We can't promise you business we don't have."

"Look, I've seen your products. I know you're going to go somewhere with them. I'll make sure we give you the best price, we may not be the lowest but we won't be outlandish. I need to have contracts like this lined up in the future. I'm only thirteen but my father already expects me to be able to close deals and run a smaller factory. That's what I do in my summer holidays; I run the factory up in Newcastle. Everything I do is geared towards taking over the business. Accept my offer. Do that and I'll also invest in your company."

Without saying a word the twins held out their hands. "Deal," they chorused before handing over the instructions for the exact potion they wanted and then disappearing.

Cufbridge took the slip and looked it over. He put it into his pocket and smirked as he carried on down the dark hallway.

* * *

"Joyce? What are you doing up so early?"

"Mimi! I didn't see you there. I, um, I'm going to see Professor Flitwick about some work and I wanted to catch him before breakfast." Joyce had a discreet look at her watch, she had to leave the common room _now_ or she'd be late.

Mimi, however, did not notice Joyce's agitated look and carried on questioning her.

"Oh, well this is unexpected! Normally it's a trial trying to get you out of bed, and now you're up with the rest of us early birds! Why don't you wait until lunch to talk to Flitwick? He's not going to be at his best right now. I doubt he's had any coffee yet!" Mimi joked.

Joyce laughed weakly. She didn't mind Mimi, she was a nice girl and she often helped the first years with homework. Unfortunately, she was getting in her way at the moment. "Mimi- I'm sorry, but I really want to talk to him now."

Joyce moved to head towards the portrait, but was blocked by Mimi who quickly moved in front of her.

"Mimi?" Joyce became thoroughly confused.

Mimi bit her lip and seemed to be thinking over a decision- whatever it was; she made up her mind quickly. "James and Will saw you yesterday with Charlie Basswick. Are you going to meet him?" The girl suddenly eagerly demanded, throwing Joyce for a second.

"No! I told you, I'm going to see Professor Flitwick!" Joyce looked at her watch and paled, letting out a wail. "Oh, Mimi! You've made me late; I'm going to have to run. Please, move out of the way!"

The shock of the younger girl raising her voice caused Mimi to obey her without a second thought; she stood aside and only watched as the first year fled down the corridor.

* * *

"So, they'll ask me to brew this potion in return for…?"

"Whatever you want."

"Whatever?"

"Present your case to them clearly and make sure you show that you're offering them a good deal. They'll snatch your hand off."

"And after this we're even?"

"We shouldn't be, as I'm doing you a bigger favour than you are to me, but I'm feeling generous, so yes, we'll be even."

"I must thank you for giving me an in. I know under normal circumstances they'd never listen."

"You really want this, don't you Cufbridge?"

"I don't only want it Zabini, I need it. So they'll ask tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow."

Cufbridge left the unused classroom. Ten minutes later he was followed by Zabini.

* * *

Harry Potter hadn't been sleeping well for months and it showed. He became easily frustrated and grouchier- especially in the mornings. So Blaise Zabini didn't have to do much to convince him to go along with his plan, and after the confrontation between Draco Malfoy and himself, Harry was glad to be a part of it.

Harry eyed the mellow yellow potions that Zabini had left on the table for him. The name wasn't that original, the potions were yellow and they made people feel mellow after taking one.

Harry wondered idly if it would be possible to slip some to Snape.

* * *

"Ready, Bill?"

"I am if you are, Ben." Bill pretended to warm up and, laughing at his friends antics, Ben followed suit.

The group of students with them also joined in with the laughter, but fell silent as they heard cackling going on above them. Ben stopped pretending he was a boxer and went over to one of the suits of armour that lined the halls. He took one last look at the ceiling above him before pushing the suit over and diving onto his friend. The other students surrounded them and were quiet until someone started the cries.

"Fight!" The call was taken up by all as they watched the two roll around on the floor.

"Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!" they all chanted.

* * *

"Joyce, isn't it?" Seeing the girls hesitant nod the speaker went on, "I have some friends who would like it very much if you went to see your Head of House tomorrow, before breakfast, and keep him there until it was half way over."

"I don't understand," she said, feeling uncomfortable.

"Come now, you're a bright Ravenclaw. I think you know what I'm saying."

"Well yes, but why? Why me?"

"You caught their eye. As they understand it, you don't have much spending money, certainly not enough to cover that little habit of yours."

Joyce blushed, "Please, don't tell my parents! They would hate to find out."

"Don't worry, your parents won't find out about your love of trashy romances if you do what we ask."

Seeing she had no choice, Joyce agreed. "Okay. I'll do it."

"Wonderful! Here," the voice said as they chucked a small money bag over, "this should help you buy a couple. You know what to do, run along now."

The girl caught the bag and looked up into the shadows, still unable to catch a glimpse of the person who had called out to her; she turned and ran back the way she came.

* * *

Jonathon Cufbridge had set up a makeshift potions lab directly above the dungeons. Hopefully, as it was not in Snape's normal stomping ground, Snape would not find it too soon. The second benefit to not being in the dungeons was, of course, the good ventilation and natural light. It was strange to not be brewing by flickering candle light.

The potion was nearly completed. It was hard to make as much of it had to be done in a short time. Cufbridge was adding grounded spider intestines at the same time as pouring in some Blast Ended Skrewt stomach acid.

Not surprisingly, Cufbridge's nose was screwed up in distaste as the disgusting fumes from the cauldron bubbled up into his face.

After another ten minutes of adding, pouring and stirring, the potion was finished. Cufbridge peered over the edge of the cauldron- something one should never do- and eyed the angrily bubbling potion nervously. It was a strong red colour, runny and serous. So far the potion seemed perfect, but appearances could be deceiving. Cufbridge carefully dipped a ladle into the cauldron and made sure not to draw out too much. He nervously made his way over to an old table which had on top of it a small block of stone. Painstakingly lifting the ladle above the block, Cufbridge allowed himself to relax slightly, before tilting the ladle and allowing the liquid to flow over the piece of stone. A quiet hiss was heard and a trail of pink smoke was emitted, curling towards the ceiling. A black hole was left and Cufbridge smiled in satisfaction.

"Perfect," he said simply.

He cleaned the ladle with a cloth, the potion having no effect on it, and returned it to his bag of instruments.

After a look at his watch, Cufbridge saw he had another ten minutes before he was needed, and with nothing to do until then he grabbed a stool and opened up his Potioneer Weekly magazine. It always helped staying on top of the latest news and discoveries, especially when one was in the business.

* * *

"I have never! Never! Been so ashamed in all my years teaching at Hogwarts!"

This latest comment was yelled by the loveable head of Hufflepuff. For the past twenty minutes Bill and Ben had been in a classroom with the two heads being berated for their actions.

When the fight began, McGonagall and Sprout quickly arrived on the scene. Pushing their way through the throng of spectators they had come upon two boys known for being best of friends. Although puzzled by their actions, the two heads pushed those thoughts to the side and pulled the two boys apart. One woman holding one boy, and the other holding the other. The two boys screamed at each other, their words fast and furious- and not in the slightest understandable.

The head of Gryffindor sternly told the gathered students to depart and sharply demanded Bill and Ben stop making any noise, which they hastily agreed to do.

When the last student had left, the two women released the boys from their holds before marching them into the nearest classroom, where they began questioning their actions, intelligence and sanity.

Twenty minutes later they were still at it, though beginning to wind down.

Another five minutes later and Bill and Ben both had two detentions and had lost 30 house points each.

The two heads left them after giving them one last disappointed look.

"Well, that was fun." Bill said, grinning.

"It was certainly different." Ben agreed, also smiling.

The two high-fived and went to get what was left of breakfast.

* * *

Blaise left the Great Hall happy. He had just given the potions to Potter and knew that all over the school plans were in motion that would mean that for the next thirty minutes the Great Hall would be clear of any head of house. And, as they were normally the only ones who showed up, all the other teachers preferring to have breakfast in their rooms, the Great Hall looked like it would be empty this breakfast.

The Hall was starting to fill with students, more than usual at this time in the morning. They were obviously expected something.

Blaise would hate to disappoint.

After gaining access to the common room Blaise distractedly walked up to his dorm, well aware he was being followed by two Draco clones, both wearing nothing but little PVC shorts. Actually, one did also have a spiked collar.

Blaise's disinterest in the two was not shared by the rest of the Slytherin house, who were staring at the two in horror and mirth.

Blaise entered the dorm. "Morning, Draco. Ready to go?"

Draco was dressed and was sat on his bed slipping on his last shoe. "Yes, I've just got to put on my-" Draco looked over at Blaise and froze.

"Tie?" Blaise supplied.

"Y-y-y-e-e-s." Draco stuttered, as he tied his tie. His hands were shaking and he was making a mess of it. Blaise laughed and walked over to him.

"Honestly Draco, are you that tired you can't even put on your tie?" He teasingly asked, tying Draco's tie for him.

"There! Now," Blaise grabbed Draco's arm. "Come on." And tugged him from the room.

Draco followed him in a daze, out of the room, down the stairs and out of the common room, all the while being followed by two naked clones of himself.

By the time they arrived at the hall, Draco had recovered his composure, worried about Draco 1 and Draco 2 as he was calling them in his head, but safe in the knowledge no-one else could see them.

He still cast looks around though, but no-one seemed to be paying attention to him and Blaise, in fact, some students were still so tired they were leaning over the table, their bodies shaking with, what Draco could only believe them to be, snores.

The two Slytherins walked over to the Slytherin table. However, they were only followed by one of the clones.

The other clone stood still before turning in the opposite direction and walking towards the lion's table.

With everyone's eyes on them no-one noticed Ron Weasley and Harry Potter down two small vials of an unknown yellow potion. Immediately the effects were seen. The two had lazy smiles placed on their faces and their bodies seemed to lose all stiffness, relaxing and spreading out across the table.

Blaise and Draco sat down and helped themselves to breakfast. Draco 1 also sat down.

"Y'know Draco, me and Draco 2 have been talking," Draco tensed but carried on eating. "And we think that although Snape is handsome in that brooding mood-ing way, he's also, how shall I put it? Jaded? So, we've been thinking and we don't want Snape anymore, -that means you don't want him any more- we want HIM." With the last word the clone lifted an arm and pointed across the hall at Harry Potter.

"Of course." Draco mumbled. "Who bloody else?"

Draco 1 giggled and nudged Draco. "Look! Draco 2 is so lucky, look what he's doing!"

Draco looked up in fear of what he might see.

It was…scarring.

Draco 2 was waving his shiny PVC clad ass in the Saviour of the Wizarding World's face, every so often smacking it, and emitting a light gasp of pleasure.

Draco blinked. Draco 1 squealed.

"Can we join in?" he asked, not even waiting for an answer before running off to join Draco 2.

The two clones were now fawning over the Boy Who Lived, messing with his hair, running their bodies up against his and dancing around him. Draco wished they would stop shaking their asses in Potter's face.

Despite himself, Draco was unable to look away.

He had to watch as Draco 1 picked up a sausage and began eating it in a way that could be misunderstood.

He had to watch as Draco 2 poured syrup all over his naked chest.

He had to watch as Harry Potter leant over and began licking the syrup off Draco 2's chest- what?!

Draco shook his head and looked again. No, what he saw the first time was still there. Draco 2 was lying down on the table and Harry bloody Potter was licking his chest. Draco 1, who was sat next to Potter, leaned into him and offered him part of the sausage he was eating. Potter eagerly grasped some.

No-one but Draco was seeing this, and right then all the hate Draco had been feeling for his sub-conscience was insignificant in comparison to the pure rage and hate that now coursed through his body. Draco Malfoy had enough people against him; he did _not_ need his own self trying to destroy him.

He let out a shriek which embodied all the pain he felt. The Great Hall turned in shock towards him. Draco ignored their eyes and continued to bellow, pushing food off the table, ripping his robes off him and yelling a defiant: "No!"

Blaise watched in horror as his best friend broke right before him, he hadn't- couldn't- imagine it could have been this spectacular.

"Draco!" Draco 2 called out.

"Stop it man! Just embrace it!" added Draco 1.

"Don't let it destroy you!" Draco 2 pleaded.

And in their own way, the Twins knew exactly what to say.

Draco laughed manically. "I don't love Harry Potter!" He shouted passionately. He carried on laughing. "No-one! No. One. Will ever tell me I do, because I know I bloody don't!"

The Great Hall was silent as the students watched.

Draco burst into tears and ran out of the hall, leaving everyone even more shocked than before.

All eyes turned to Blaise Zabini as he stood up and followed Draco out of the hall.

After having done that to his own best _friend_, no-one would be getting in his way anytime soon.

* * *

Cufbridge's watch beeped and he put down his magazine.

He walked over to the desk where the cauldron stood and with a heavy heart pushed it off the desk and allowed it to seep onto the floor.

Ten seconds later he was staring down into the shocked face of Severus Snape, who was stood in his bedroom chamber only able to look up in horror at the promising third year student.

"You've had an accident?" he calmly and quietly asked.

Cufbridge nodded.

Snape sighed. The negative effect of his carefully cultivated image was that the promising potions students normally ended up experimenting on their own without his experienced eye on them. It wasn't until their sixth or seventh year did they build up the courage to ask.

"Wait there. I'll be up in a minute." Cufbridge would be punished of course. He did just burn a hole in the ceiling, but with the talent he had…well, his time in detentions would be spent more on brewing than on scrubbing.

Snape scowled at the boy as he grabbed his clothes to go and get changed in his bathroom.

"Stupid boy."

* * *

*sniffs* So, that's the end of Breaking Draco Malfoy. I hope you've enjoyed reading it as much as I've enjoyed writing it.

Thanks much go to **ThatGirlCanRock **who has been my main beta for this, and many thanks to **FaithfulHPReader**, who has reviewed every single chapter and very kindly also looked over this chapter for me.

There is an epilogue after this, it will be put up tomorrow night.

Reviews are always eagerly welcomed, even if it's just 'I am reading this.'

Sarah.


	16. Warping Minds and Missing Homework

"Good morning Mr Malfoy. How are we today?" The Healer's warm brown eyes radiated with false care and concern.

Draco sat up and looked disdainfully over at the man. He was about to reply with a snarky comment when the man's arms started becoming blurry and distorting. Looking up to his face Draco saw that the easy smile was becoming twisted, enlarging and expanding flashing Draco a view of the man's pearly white teeth.

The Healer kept changing, growing taller and then shorter, fatter then thinner. Draco pushed himself back further on to the bed, drawing his knees up as he reached the wall.

Staring in horror at the man, Draco watched as the Healer slowly stopped changing so much. His body had become leaner, his height was shortened and his once pepper and grey hair was now completely... platinum blond. His clothes, once a plain set of robes had shrunk and turned into a black shiny material, shrinking to caress every curve.

The Healer giggled and drew closer to Draco who, with his back already to the wall, was unable to shrink away.

As the horror sat on the bed and lifted up his arms to draw Draco closer, Draco finally found his voice and let out a terrified scream.

* * *

"Casey I need to have someone posted and watching Mr Malfoy at all times. Relapses like this aren't going to help. As soon as you see him acting different get in there."

"I assure you Mr and Mrs Malfoy we are doing everything we can."

"It's been two weeks now Sir. The boy seems to be getting better one moment and then a moment later he curls up into a ball and rocks himself back and forth whispering to himself."

"Have you found the cause yet? No?"

"It's time to do something more drastic, the usual methods aren't working."

* * *

"As you are aware Mr Malfoy has been in St. Mungo's for the past two weeks where they are trying to bring him back to his usual self and to ensure that he is going to be all right. Yesterday, after a short consultation with his parents, the Healers have decided that a small memory wipe may be the easiest way to help Mr Malfoy. They believe something from the last number of weeks triggered all these…_things_ Mr Malfoy has been seeing. I have kept your involvement out of this, as no-one 'officially' knows what you've done. I don't believe I need to make it clear that you were playing a dangerous game, I'm sure you've realised that by now."

The old headmaster of Hogwarts peered at the Slytherin boy, over his half moon glasses.

"As it is, you've 'officially' done nothing wrong, so I cannot punish you for your hand in Mr Malfoy's small breakdown. Unfortunately though, Professor Flitwick has brought it to my attention that you have not handed in a piece of homework he set many, many months ago. Because you haven't handed it in I'm going to have to give you detention. Two for not handing it in and another two for every month the Professor went without it."

Blaise held the headmaster's gaze impassively.

"Your detentions will be with Professor Binns; he has heard about your research into the magical properties of beards and he would like to be a part of it. Apparently he once began a very similar project, but his death distracted him and he had forgotten about it up until now."

He popped a lemon drop into his mouth.

"Ah, where are my manners, would you like one?" he questioned, holding the bowl out.

Blaise shook his head, "No thank you, headmaster."

Dumbledore smiled. "Well, I believe that's all I have to say. I've given you detention and told you not to do it again. Mr Malfoy returns in three hours from his 'holiday,' the sanctioned reason for his memory loss is that he hit his head while practising some Quidditch moves." Dumbledore thought for a moment before continuing. "Although, it had been said that memory loss cannot be caused by knocks to the head. Hmm…Mr Malfoy isn't planning on becoming a Healer, is he?"

"No, it's not his sort of thing."

"Ah, no…I see what you mean. Well, until he returns you may spend your time with Professor Binns- he is expecting you."

Taking it as his dismissal, Blaise rose and left the office, not seeing the pensive look that watched his departure.

* * *

**You all know who my beta was by now, a final big thank you to her and again to ****FaithfulHPReader.**

**Thank you to everyone who has reviewed and to anyone who is going to review for the first and final time. **

**It's been fun people,**

**Sarah.**


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